Relationships: For Love or Money?

By: Gabrielle Seunagal

Updated February 24, 2020

Relationships are inherently complex, especially in the present day and age. There are various reasons that determine whether or not someone enters into and remains in a relationship. Many people have their own objectives when it comes to relationships and the motivating factors that drive them. Sometimes, people pass judgments when the relationships of others do not meet what they perceive to be acceptable standards.

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One of the most prevalent themes in relationships is whether people should form attachments for the purpose of love or money. Many individuals favor love and believe that mutual care and affection should ultimately determine whether or not they wind up in a relationship with someone. However, not all individuals subscribe to this philosophy. There are others who believe that relationships are about power and money. Individuals with this outlook generally maintain that social status, income, and other lifestyle factors will be determined by the person they are involved. In some cases, this outlook is accurate, but nevertheless, it still does not erase the debate on whether or not relationships ought to be driven by love or money.

Should You Be In A Relationship For Love Or Money?

Whether or not you should involve yourself in a relationship for the sake of love or money ultimately depends upon personal values and what you hope to gain from the relationship. A person who believes in connecting for the sake of love may have critical views of those who join forces for monetary purposes. Likewise, individuals who believe that money should drive relationships may view love-based relationships as naive and nonsensical.

Regardless of your decision, there are always consequences. These consequences don't have to be negative, but the dynamics of a love-based relationship will differ from the dynamics of a relationship which is grounded in money matters. Whether or not the contrast in dynamics is positive or negative again depends upon the personal values of the individual at hand. Entering into a relationship for love or money is a decision which each person needs to make for themselves. Sometimes, family and cultural factors can impact an individual's choice, but ultimately, they determine which relationships they choose to be a part of.

What Happens When You Enter Into A Relationship For Love?

First and foremost, it's important to note that many people view love as an important factor for entering into a relationship. In many cases, love-based relationships share various prevalent themes, including the desire to emotionally connect, the enjoyment of a partner's company, and an interest in finding the love of one's life. Entering into a relationship for love does not always guarantee happiness. There are many people who find themselves in relationships where their partner cheats on them or otherwise betrays them in some manner. Of course, being with someone for love does not mean that you will get hurt. However, it's a risk which individuals inherently take when they become emotionally attached to and invested in another human being. Entering into a relationship for love does not guarantee the success or failure of that relationship. The manner in which the involved individuals choose to conduct themselves is what will ultimately determine the longevity of said relationship.

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What Happens When You Enter Into A Relationship For Money?

When money is the fundamental basis of a relationship, this certainly changes certain dynamics. In these types of relationships, there tends to be an imbalance of sorts. The two partners may have different outlooks on money or variations in spending types. Sometimes, these differences can complement one another like Yin and Yang; in other cases, they can cause problems and generate negative feelings between the people in the relationship.

A relationship that is rooted in money has a higher likelihood to be more transactional and less emotionally-charged than a loved-based relationship. Certain individuals view this aspect as a major negative factor, whereas other people are OK with this dynamic and find that it works well for them.

How To Determine Which Relationship Model Is Best For You

When it's all said and done, only you can determine whether or not love or money will serve as the dominant factor for entering into a relationship. Regardless of which decision you make, your comfort levels are what matters most. If you and your spouse are in a consensual marriage with healthy boundaries, and both of your needs are being met in healthy ways, then the question of why you married each other should be your own business. Other individuals may weigh in with their takes, but at the end of the day, you have to live with the decisions you make. Nobody else has to live with the results which follow from the advice they give you. This is why knowing who you are and knowing your values as an individual is so significant when dealing with relationships.

Know What You Want

Before entering into any relationship, knowing what you want is very critical. Believe it or not, there are many people who lack a truly concrete understanding of what they're searching for in a relationship, be it love, money, or something else entirely. Regardless, it's important to know who you are, what your standards are, and the dynamics which are acceptable to you. In many cases, individuals who are unaware of what they want may end up in relationships which are not compatible; this, in and of itself, opens the door to a series of problems which can be avoided.

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Contrary to black and white perceptions on relationships, there are certain relationships where love and money both play a role. While relationships can be exclusively love or money-based, this is not the case in each and every circumstance. No matter which category you fall into, knowing the degree to which love or money matters in your life will certainly make a significant difference in determining your best relationship model.

There are some people who believe that love conquers all and this is what drives their relationships. Also, there are situations where people come together for the sake of having a certain lifestyle, projecting a particular image to the public, etc. Take as much time as you need, but in order to end up in a relationship which is best for you, knowing yourself is very important.

Know that Relationships are not Always Easy to Remove Oneself From

If someone is bound and determined to exit a relationship, they can almost always find a way to make that happen. However, doing this is not always easy and it can come at a cost, regardless of whether love or money is a dominant factor. When love is involved, emotional attachments, personal memories, and sentimentality can complicate the process of exiting a relationship. In relationships which are rooted in money, losing social status, forfeiting a certain lifestyle and relinquishing access to various amenities can muddle the exit from a relationship.

Understand that No Relationship is Perfect

Regardless of whether a relationship is carried by love or money, the reality is that issues will arise. Regardless of which relationship you choose to be a part of, having reasonable expectations and knowing what you're getting yourself into is critical When people enter into any relationship with unrealistic or unmerited expectations, this can cause issues, regardless of whether love or money is involved.

When Faced With Issues In Your Relationship

Regardless of which route you choose, it's important to know that there are available options if you are struggling in your relationship or other areas of life. Part of living is dealing with various issues and setbacks in different aspects of life. While dealing can be tough, the good news is that tough times can serve as learning experiences and opportunities for growth if we allow them to.

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There are tools to help you cope with relationship issues in ways that will empower you to have the most fulfilling relationships possible. One of these tools is licensed counseling. Speaking with a licensed counselor is proven to help solve relationship issues, such as a lack of intimacy, emotional injury, and other relationship issues.

Did you know that using online therapy is an excellent way to gain access to professional help regardless of where you are in the world? When you take online therapy with BetterHelp, you're promptly able to work with a professional who will get to know you, understand your situation and then determine the best ways to provide guidance. Of course, signing up for online therapy does not mean that you will never face issues in your relationship or other areas; however, working with a professional therapist does ensure that you have a reliable support system in your corner, regardless of what obstacles you may face.