"I Don't Want To Wake Up": Steps To Combat A Morning Slump As A Parent

Difficulty waking up may indicate a medical or mental health condition, so it can be important to seek care from a medical practitioner to rule out conditions like narcolepsy, chronic fatigue syndrome, major depressive disorder and PTSD. 

If these conditions are ruled out but you’re still feeling worn out, you may be experiencing something called parental burnout—which can result from the possible chronic stress of parenting. Usually, lifestyle adjustments and therapy can help reduce fatigue.

Parental burnout is a syndrome that can be characterized by exhaustion and driven by chronic stress. While parental burnout is not a recognized psychiatric disorder, it can be a very common type of burnout, with an estimated 66% of working parents experiencing it. 

Common symptoms and signs of burnout can include: 

• Overwhelming exhaustion, which may be emotional and/or physical

• Chronic stress

• Feelings of nervousness

• Irritability

• Experiencing anger or resentment about childcare duties

• Isolating yourself from your child

• Feeling “trapped”

• Feeling as if you have nothing left to give or like you’re in “survival mode”

• Distress, shame and/or guilt

• Ideation about escape or suicide

If you or a loved one are experiencing suicidal thoughts, reach out for help immediately. The National Suicide Prevention Lifeline can be reached at 988, and is available 24/7.

Oftentimes, overwhelming exhaustion can be the first symptom of parental burnout. If you’re having trouble getting out of bed in the morning, it can be important to take actions to address it right away.   

Strategies to address parental burnout

There are many strategies you can try to reduce your fatigue and improve your mental health, including the following: 

Talk to your partner and support network

Parental burnout can be common, and it can happen to anyone—but according to Dr. Moïra Mikolajczak, it can require immediate attention. Notifying your spouse, co-parent, partner and/or your support network can be a strong a first step. You might consider brainstorming what would make your workload less overwhelming, empowering you to clearly ask for what you need. 

Modern parenting expectations might often place the responsibility of childcare solely on parents—but historically (and still in many cultures), extended family and community people have generally played an active role in child rearing in many cases. 

Prioritize sleep

If you’re having difficulty getting up in the morning, you may not be getting enough quality sleep. If you have an infant, you may want to consider taking naps while your child is asleep during the day and alternating with your partner on nighttime baby duties.  

Other steps, such as using blackout curtains, reducing use of technology before bed, using a white noise machine and setting a routine sleep schedule can help improve the quality of your sleep. If you can, you might consider aiming for at least 7 hours of sleep per night.

Make time for exercise

It can sound counterintuitive to exercise when you’re exhausted. However, exercise has been clinically shown to reduce stress, improve mood, increase energy levels and improve sleep quantity and quality in most. This can be attributed to endorphins that can be released after prolonged periods of movement and activity. 

Rest and relax

Listening to music, taking time to sit outside, practicing mindfulness or meditation, starting an art project or reading a book can help you feel less overwhelmed by parenting duties and responsibilities. 

If you’re feeling overwhelmed, you can use the “HALT” acronym and ask yourself: “Am I hungry, angry, lonely or tired?” This question can be a simple and concise way to check in with your needs and address them efficiently. 

Cut down on commitments 

If your schedule is driven by your child’s activities, you might consider reducing the number of commitments you have over a given time period, or communicating with other parents to schedule carpools. 

Understand that parenting is hard

Parenting can be difficult for most people, and Kendra Wilde points out that there can be systemic issues that can make it that much more challenging. 

Releasing unsustainable goals and practicing self-compassion can benefit your mental health and increase parenting joy.  

Try online therapy (and how it can help)

If you’re finding it challenging to reduce burnout on your own, or if you just want someone to talk to, you can reach out to a therapist. If your time is limited or if you’d prefer to try therapy from home, you may want to consider online therapy from a service like BetterHelp. 

This method of therapeutic intervention can often be more convenient and affordable for many, making it a competitive choice over other methods. 

Is online therapy effective? 

A recent study published in Cureus has found information that suggests that online cognitive behavioral therapy can be effective in addressing many psychiatric disorders, offering comparable benefits to those observed with in-person therapeutic intervention. 

Additionally, a 2022 study of college students found that individuals living with mental health challenges generally experienced similar reductions in psychological distress between in-person and online therapeutic methods—further cementing information found by researchers in the original study.

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