ESTJ Personality Traits

Updated December 14, 2018

Reviewer Laura Angers

Sandra was excited at the thought of sharing her work experiences. You see, she was recently appointed the manager in one of the departments at her job. Within a few months, Sandra had streamlined the job procedures and guidelines so effectively that her employer was in a position to cut the number of employees from 29 to 24. She is good at organizing affairs at the workplace, in the community, and at the family level.

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But, after she finished sharing with acquaintances about her recent work accomplishments, Liz her best friend asked her, "Did you just make five employees jobless? Didn't you feel any remorse after getting them fired, you must be an ESTJ?" Sandra did not understand what an ESTJ personality type is and the next morning she decided to take a personality type test.

Sandra has always been an extrovert, and after taking the personality type test, she was blown away by the results. She has never been a shy person, and she answered the questions according to how she views things and situations. The part that surprised her most is the fact that she is emotionless. Is this true, she thought? Am I all business and no feeling?

ESTJ Meaning

ESTJ means extrovert, sensing, thinking, and judging. There are many people with ESTJ personality traits, and they make up about twelve percent of the world population. ESTJs are honest, reliable, and direct meaning that they tell it as it is. They do not hold much regard for people's emotions, as they prefer to rely on facts. Sandra answered all the questions in the Myers Briggs test and for sure, she realized that she is an ESTJ. Perhaps can relate to Sandra. How many of the ETSJ personality traits listed below do you connect with?

A Great Leader. Sandra has always been excellent at management positions at the workplace. ESTJs are also referred to as the supervisors or the executives because the ESTJ personality traits show one who has great leadership qualities. Moreover, an ESTJ is reliable, honest, and organized, and they are all good qualities for someone who wants to take charge.

Busy Social Life. Sandra likes to be active, and you'd never describe her as lazy. Her busy life is proof enough that she is an ESTJ. Since high school, she has had solid friendships, and wherever she goes, she gets to make more pals. People with ESTJ personality traits are likely to have friends with similar personality traits, and they do not like the display of emotions in their relationships.

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ESTJs Find It Hard To Relax. As an ESTJ, organization, and order take the priority. Unless an ESTJ has achieved what he/she desire, then it unlikely to find them relaxed. They are hard workers, and when they get the chance to relax, ESTJs prefer to have time alone free from other people's demands. Sandra likes to go out and engage in fun activities, but what matters most is sharing time with her loved ones at home.

Do Not Like To Show Emotions. ESTJs are not emotionless per se, but they do prefer to deal with facts. Most people find ESTJs to be heartless due to their struggle with emotions. For instance, when Sandra made the changes in the company five people lost their jobs. She felt that is was necessary as long as it is what it is good for the company. ESTJs can seem emotionless in many situations, and they often lose focus on how their actions affect people. Actions play a big role in the mind of an ESTJ, and they do not desire to hear verbally that one loves them. Instead, they prefer to be shown love through actions and not through emotions.

Direct And Honest. ESTJs are very honest and direct, and their answers are informative and straight to the point. If you ask an ESTJ personality type person a question, they will tell you as it is, and they do not hold back. Sandra noted that at times, she says things that make her regret later, but this is just her personality at work. For ESTJs, straightforward statements matter a lot whether it is welcomed or not.

Stable Relationships. ESTJs take relationships very seriously, and they know what they start from any kind of relationship from the word go. When dating an ESTJ, it is important that you plan your dates very well as they do not like spontaneous activities. Besides, they like when one is original or authentic, and their character enables them to spot when one is phony.

Sandra likes dating authentic people, and she likes when they are just themselves. It takes time before a person with ESTJ personality trait can have a very intimate relationship. They do not like to be pushed into emotional affairs too fast. Remember, they are poor at expressing their emotions. However, they value commitment and trustworthiness, and they like being in strong and stable relationships.

Be aware that ESTJs have strong principles and they are always right. It is good to have a strong personality and confidence, but remember that such an attitude can make the partner feel threatened and ignored.

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ESTJs Prefer Physical Intimacy. When approaching sexuality, ESTJs like to have physical intimacy rather than approaching intimacy in the emotional or spiritual perspective. Interestingly, they love fulfilling their duties to their partners even in matters of sex. Being an ESTJ, Sandra finds it hard to express herself verbally, but her sensuality compensates well for that. Feelings and emotions are one of the weakest points of ESTJs, therefore, when dating an ESTJ do not expect to have a lot of touchy-feely moments. It's simply not the way of an ESTJ. But this doesn't have to be the case. Many ESTJs decide to seek out help from one of our trained therapists at BetterHelp so they can become more balanced when it comes to emotions.

ESTJs Care A Lot About What People Think Of Them. ESTJs pretend to not care about other people's opinions, but the truth is that other people's opinion of them matters. In social media, ESTJs value what their followers or friends think of them. In fact, ESTJ may spend many hours trying to figure out how their social media followers can love them more. Even in the community, work, or family set up, ESTJs respect those around them and are very concerned about public opinions.

ESTJs Are Reliable. Friends and family of ESTJs often find them to be very reliable. They are loyal, and when their friends and family need assistance, one can count on them at all times. ESTJs take their responsibilities seriously and being held accountable matters to them. When an ESTJ promises to do something, they always make sure that they have fulfilled their duties and responsibilities. ESTJs can do anything possible to accomplish what they have promised to do. Although they may not act emotionally, in a difficult situation, an ESTJ personality type friend can never abandon you.

Orderly And Organized. After taking the test, Sandra realized that she has always been very organized. ESTJs make plans for everything, and they do not like spontaneous things. Sandra acknowledges that she is very organized but not a minimalist. ESTJs like to have everything in their life in good order. Even at the workplace, ESTJs are hard workers, and they like taking charge of organizing people and projects. They are the best consummate organizers, and they like bringing structure to their community or surroundings. If ESTJs sees a little or no organization, they usually take the initiative to create processes and guidelines. They also love to-do-lists and use planners.

Stress And ESTJ. As an ESTJ, Sandra gets stressed when rules are not followed. They do not like when people try to challenge their authority. When faced in situations where there is a lack of organization and structure, ESTJs are likely to get a lot of stress or anxiety. At the workplace and even in family setups ESTJs have strict traditions and ethics. If these traditions and ethics are not followed, ESTJs get stressed.

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Under intense stress, ESTJs become withdrawn, become sensitive to criticism, and may want to be alone. Moreover, when in stressful situations, ESTJs may feel undervalued and isolated from others. According to Sandra, when she is stressed she loves it when people validate her feelings, she does not like to attack the problem directly, and she likes to be listened to so that she can talk it out.

In Conclusion

It is very common to find people with ESTJ personality traits. ESTJs are known for their dedicated, leadership skills, lack of emotions, factual, and logical thinking. If one is confident and friendly, and at the same very direct and honest, then one could be an ESTJ. The best way to know your personality type is by answering the personality type questions. In relationships, ESTJs do not show emotions, as they prefer to show love through their actions. On the other hand, their partner may misinterpret this as neglect. To avoid problems in their relationships, it is vital for a person with ESTJ personality traits to seek the help of professional counselors.

Do the above ESTJ personality traits resonate with you? Find out more by contacting us at BetterHelp; our trained therapists will help you understand your personality type, and why it is an important tool in maintaining healthy relationships.


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