How to recognize and overcome porn addiction

Medically reviewed by Melissa Guarnaccia
Updated March 18, 2024by BetterHelp Editorial Team

If you’re worried that you could be developing a porn addiction, you’re not alone. For some individuals, the use of pornography can start to feel like an obsession or a compulsion. It may begin to take up more time than they would like and get in the way of other priorities. They may have difficulty limiting their usage to appropriate times and places, which may lead to further negative consequences. 

If you are wondering how to deal with porn addiction, there is help available. Seeking help for compulsive pornography use or addictions may be challenging, but there is help available, whether through support groups or counseling—both in person and online.

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Therapy can help you regain control over your pornography use

Can pornography become an addiction?

There’s some disagreement in the mental health field about whether it makes sense to talk about “porn addiction.” The current edition of the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders (known as the DSM-5) does not list pornography addiction as a mental illness or sexual addiction. However, some researchers believe that problematic pornography use should be classified as a type of behavioral addiction similar to challenges like gambling, substance abuse, and internet addiction.

Many people, especially those who might be considered a pornography addict, have different ideas about how much use of sexually explicit media or time watching porn is a problem. Research on undergraduates suggests that people with stronger religious beliefs may be more likely to feel that they’re addicted to pornography—no matter how much or little they’re actually watching porn. Some people may feel a sense of shame over even occasional viewing of porn, regarding themselves as addicted because they’re engaging in behavior they feel is wrong.

However, there is some evidence that prolonged, high-frequency use of pornography may involve brain changes similar to those observed in people who use addictive substances in excess. Areas of the prefrontal cortex that manage impulse control may shrink as a porn habit grows, while areas associated with pleasure and desire appear to develop a heightened sensitivity to sexually explicit images. Also, some people experience significant disruptions to their lives as a result of their pornography use.

Potential effects of porn

Although some people have moral and ethical concerns about viewing sexually explicit media, it’s not clear that it’s always harmful from a mental health standpoint. Some people, particularly those not suffering from a mental health disorder or a perceived addiction, may find that they experience some positive effects from light or moderate use of pornography. These benefits may include improved sexual communication between partners, more openness to different types of sexual activity, and greater tolerance of other people’s sexual preferences. Some LGBTQ+ individuals may also find that pornography makes it easier to understand and accept their own sexual identity.

On the other hand, pornography consumption might also lead to some negative outcomes, such as sexual dissatisfaction and different types of sexual dysfunction, such as erectile dysfunction. These outcomes may be particularly harmful in people who are addicted to porn and have difficulty controlling their usage. For example, some research indicates that a high frequency of pornography viewing might increase the likelihood of sexual dysfunction, such as lack of arousal or difficulty maintaining erections.

Other studies have reported links between repeated viewing of pornography and negative or even violent attitudes toward women. However, these results have been disputed by other researchers. There’s still a substantial amount of debate within the psychological community about the effects of viewing sexually explicit materials on a person’s sex life and mental health.

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How to recognize addiction

We don’t currently have a broadly accepted diagnostic framework for pornography addiction, which can make it challenging for a porn addict to identify if they have a problem. However, the following factors may be warning signs of porn addiction:

  • Using pornography so frequently that you have little time for other activities
  • Feeling unable to stop watching pornography
  • Having repetitive thoughts about pornography that make it hard to focus during daily life
  • Neglecting responsibilities, social functions, or time with loved ones to watch pornography
  • Using pornography in risky or inappropriate contexts, such as at work or in public places
  • Experiencing difficulty becoming aroused or enjoying sex without pornography
  • Having a lack of interest in other activities you normally enjoy due to pornography consumption
  • Experiencing relationship conflicts related to extreme pornography use
  • Feeling sadness and anxiety following pornography use, but continuing anyway
  • Spending so much money on pornography or pornographic material that it’s difficult to afford other things

These can all be indicators that your use of porn is interfering with other things in your life that matter to you. If you’re viewing porn so much that it’s causing you unhappiness and difficulty, yet you still find it hard to stop, it could be a sign that you could benefit from re-evaluating your use of porn. 

In some cases, internet pornography addiction may be linked to an underlying mental health condition, such as an anxiety disorder. Compulsive porn consumption can also fall under the umbrella of behaviors associated with hypersexual disorder or sex addiction. 

Addressing addiction

The following approaches may help you get your porn consumption under control and keep a potential online porn addiction from disrupting your life:

Restrict the urge to access it

The incredible ease of obtaining porn may be part of the reason some people find it hard to cut back. Anyone with an internet connection can obtain an enormous variety of sexual images or videos with just a few clicks, which means that the desire to watch porn can often be acted on almost immediately.

By making pornography viewing more difficult for yourself, you may be able to interrupt this cycle. You can try taking out any sexually explicit material you’ve downloaded and throwing away any physical pornographic media. If your goal is to cut back but not necessarily to quit, you could move your digital material to a separate flash drive and store it someplace that’s inconvenient to obtain. Meanwhile, you can install porn-filtering software on your computer.

You might think that this would have little effect because it’s easy to get around self-imposed restrictions. However, adding a pause between desire and satisfaction may give you enough time to rethink what you’re doing and decide against it.

Communicate in your relationship

Seeking help for pornography addiction may be more common among people who are in committed relationships. This might be because porn addiction or consumption may affect sexual satisfaction with a partner or cause other problems in a couple’s sex life, such as unrealistic expectations and performance anxiety.

Sometimes these conflicts arise because one person is upset by the other’s porn use. In other cases, though, an individual may hide their use of porn. Keeping this kind of secret from your partner might cause a sense of distance between you, which could get worse if you’re also less interested in sex or other kinds of physical and emotional intimacy. Your partner might feel neglected or hurt even though you intend no harm.

It may help to be honest with your partner about the difficulty you’re having with pornography use or feelings of addiction. This might help restore trust and communication in your relationship. As a result, your partner may be able to offer you emotional support as you work to make positive changes, especially if you also struggle with other challenges like a mental health disorder or drug abuse.

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Therapy can help you regain control over your pornography use

Practice mindful self-acceptance

An online porn addiction sometimes comes with feelings of shame. Some research suggests that for men seeking treatment for addiction, feelings of shame may decrease a person’s belief in their ability to change or overcome the addiction.

Even though it may be challenging, you may find it helpful to accept and forgive yourself for your addictions. Practices such as journaling, mindfulness meditation, and self-compassion might help you release negative ideas about yourself. These activities could make it easier to change your habits as you learn to feel more in control of your internet porn consumption. Research suggests that self-acceptance may help with treating problematic pornography use or in the process of overcoming other addictions. You may find that self-acceptance is easier if you talk to others experiencing this addiction, and you can connect with others through a support group, whether in person or online.

A 2022 study comparing different treatments for the compulsive use of pornography (porn addiction) found that cognitive-behavioral therapy showed evidence of effectiveness in helping participants to overcome their addictions.

If you’re uncomfortable with the idea of talking with a therapist about your porn addiction in person, online therapy may be a more comfortable approach to addiction treatment. You can choose between various methods for sessions, including text chat, voice calls, and videoconferencing, which might make it easier to open up about the addictions you're experiencing. Many people find that connecting with a therapist remotely improves their comfort with the process.

CBT can help reframe the stories you tell yourself

Research shows that cognitive-behavioral therapy can be just as effective when delivered remotely as it is in person, and it can work for a variety of mental disorders and mental health challenges, including bipolar disorder, substance use disorders, alcohol abuse, and sex addiction. One review concluded that the many studies on this approach offered “compelling support for the efficacy and effectiveness of online CBT.”

Takeaway

Pornography addiction is a controversial diagnosis among some mental health professionals, as porn addiction is not recognized in the DSM-5. However, difficulties controlling porn use can cause a variety of challenges. If you’re experiencing concerns about pornography usage and your ability to stop watching porn, you are not alone. With BetterHelp, you can be matched with a licensed therapist who has experience helping people with porn addiction begin to overcome their compulsion. You can connect with a therapist from the comfort of your own home via phone, live chat, or videoconferencing. Take the first step toward freedom from porn addiction and reach out to BetterHelp today.

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