Dating Quotes To Make You Laugh

Updated January 17, 2023by BetterHelp Editorial Team

Things sometimes don't turn out as we anticipate in the dating world. Dating misunderstandings may feel disheartening or irritating at the time, but sometimes in retrospect, those awkward moments can become learning opportunities. In the best-case scenario, they can become stories that will make you laugh later. 

Stressful situations often make for excellent comedy, and dating may cause stressful moments. Additionally, studies show the benefits of laughing for your mental health. Finding humor in everyday struggles may be cathartic. Consider the following quotes about dating.

Dating Is Sometimes Difficult, But Support Is Available

Dating Quotes To Make You Laugh 

Below are humorous relationship quotes to get a laugh out of dating. 

  • "I asked this one girl out, and she said, "You got a friend?" I said yes. She said, "Then go out with him." –Dom Irrera

  • "I like to date schoolteachers. If you do something wrong, they make you do it over again." –Rodney Dangerfield

  • "Dating is where you pretend you're someone you're not to impress someone you don't know." –Monica Piper

  • "I was on a date with this hot model. Well, it wasn't a 'date' date. We just ate dinner and saw a movie. Then the plane landed." –Dave Attell

  • "Give your relationship attention like you would a plant. You have to water it every day and give it sunshine. So put your man out in the sun and spray him with a hose." –Whitney Cummings

Online Dating Quotes

Online dating may be more common than ever for daters of all ages. Research shows that three in every ten adults has used a dating app or website. 

Some people embrace online dating for all its opportunities and attention, while others accept it as a necessary but unpleasant part of modern dating. However, with online dating may come a whole new set of potential mishaps. Below are some funny quotes about dating in the digital age.

  • "It's not 'GreatCupid' or even' GoodCupid.' It's OkCupid." –Helen Hong

  • "Online dating is like online shopping except you're looking for people no one wants, and it's $50 a month." –Phil Pivnick

  • "If we meet offline, and you look nothing like your pics, you're buying me drinks until you do." –Unknown

  • "I wish there was an online dating website for people who hate online dating." –Unknown

  • "I look great in my profile pictures. They were taken when I didn't need online dating to meet people." –Unknown

  • "Internet dating is the fastest, most efficient way to gather a pool of qualified candidates. It could take you a lifetime to do the investigation that the computer comes up within seconds." –Judsen Culbreth

Funny Dating Quotes By Celebrities

Celebrities may be no different from the rest of us regarding dating. They might experience the same difficulties when things don't work out and feelings of joy when things go well. 

  • "I don't have a girlfriend. But I do know a woman who'd be mad at me for saying that." –Mitch Hedberg

  • "I was dating this guy, and we would spend all day text messaging each other. He thought he could tell that he liked me more because he actually spelled the word 'you,' and I just put the letter' u.'" –Kelly Osbourne

  • "Everything I buy is vintage and smells funny. Maybe that's why I don't have a boyfriend." –Lucy Liu

  • "Before you marry a person, you should first make them use a computer with slow Internet service to see who they really are." –Will Ferrell

  • "I went out with a guy once who told me I didn't need to drink to make myself more fun to be around. I told him, 'I'm drinking so that you're more fun to be around." -Chelsea Handler

  • "I never hated a man enough to give him his diamonds back." –Zsa Zsa Gabor

Funny Intelligent Quotes About Dating 

Often, observations about dating can be funny and insightful. Many find humor in truth, especially if they can identify with that truth based on their personal experiences. Here are some quotes about dating that may not be funny for everyone but might make you laugh anyway because of how genuine they are.

  • "Never let a fool kiss you, or a kiss fool you." –Joey Adams

  • "In its purest form, dating is auditioning formatting (and auditioning means we may or may not get the part)." –Joy Browne

  • "Whenever I date a guy, I think, "Is this the man I want my children to spend their weekends with?" –Rita Rudner

  • "Dating now is a lot like going shopping when you don't have any money. Even if you find the right thing, you can't do anything about it." –Joshua Harris

Funny Quotes About Dating An Ex

Another popular dating scenario centers on reuniting with a former partner. Dating an ex isn't uncommon, and some find better success with someone they have already dated in the past. 

However, for some, dating an ex can sometimes be more stressful than dating someone for the first time. Studies show that going back to an ex-partner can increase anxiety and depression. While there is room for caution when getting back with an ex, there may also be room for laughter.

Here are some funny quotes about why it may not be the best idea to reunite with your ex:

  • "Dating an ex is the equivalent of failing a test you already had the answers to." –Kendrick Cole

  • "Current mood: Looking up my ex on LinkedIn because I blocked him on Facebook." –Dana Schwartz

  • "My friends accuse me of not being over my ex just because I'll mention her in stories or wear her clothes around my place." –Jeff Dye

  • "I used to think I would never find someone who loved me as much as my ex did. Then I remembered he hated me." –Jennifer Hall

  • "Some people don't realize what they have until it's gone, but that does not always mean they are supposed to get it back." –Stephan Labossiere

  • "All discarded lovers should be given a second chance, but with somebody else." –Mae West

  • "It rather goes without saying that Katherine drank her coffee black. Katherines do, generally. They like their coffee like their ex-boyfriends: bitter." –John Green

Funny Movie Quotes About Dating

Dating is a common topic in movies, particularly romantic comedies. Often, we watch a movie, and based on the plot, it seems evident that the screenwriters have had the same experiences as most of us around dating. Here are some funny quotes involving dating that can be found in the movies:

  • "The best thing you can do is find a person who loves you for exactly what you are. Good mood, bad mood, ugly, pretty, handsome, what have you, the right person will still think the sun shines out of your ass." –Juno
  • "You're late."
    "You're stunning."
    "You're forgiven." –Pretty Woman
  • "I realize this comes at a very inopportune time, but I really have this gigantic favor to ask of you: Choose me. Marry me. Let me make you happy. Oh, that sounds like three favors, doesn't it?" –Best Friend's Wedding

Connect With A Professional About Dating 

If you feel discouraged because your experiences with dating are not so positive right now, you're not alone. Many people have dating difficulties, but talking about it with a friend or someone you trust can help. Some prefer to speak with a licensed counselor about dating difficulties for the unbiased, skilled insight into dating they often have.

Speaking to an experienced counselor may be particularly beneficial if you find it challenging to cope long-term with the difficulties you experience around dating. Online counseling is an excellent option for those who need the guidance of a therapist but barriers like time, accessibility, and financial difficulties make it challenging to meet with one. 

Additionally, online therapy is shown to have the same benefits as in-person therapy, but with the added convenience of speaking to a counselor anytime from anywhere with an internet connection. Online counseling services like BetterHelp, match individuals with therapists who have experience treating a range of difficulties, including difficulties around dating. 

Takeaway

If you're looking for a laugh while dealing with the ins and outs of dating, the above relationship quotes may do the trick. If you're struggling with relationships and want one-on-one support, you might consider reaching out to a counselor.

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