Navigating Senior Dating: A Guide
Are you getting back into dating after divorce, being widowed or long-term single life? Many find that the dating scene for older adults is growing—possibly meaning that there are more potential matches out there for you.
Below, we’ve summarized some of the top senior dating and flirting skills that can help you get started in this new phase of life. We’ve also explored the role that online therapy can play as you work to navigate this season.
Tips For Dating As A Senior
Dating as an older adult doesn’t need to be rushed—and it doesn’t mean you have to change your standards. You might still choose to spend your time with people you sincerely respect and enjoy the company of, refusing to compromise and remaining discerning with who you choose. As you do this, you may find it helpful to remember that you do generally have the option of staying single or spending time with non-romantic friends, if you don’t feel like dating is right for you at this time.
However, if you do find yourself in the dating pool, you may find that many of your dating experiences now might be similar when compared to your earlier experiences in the dating scene. For example: You might get jitters. You might feel nervous “butterflies” because you might want to make a good impression. You might even feel that special first-date connection with a new love interest.
Or, maybe you won't—and there’s nothing wrong with that. Everyone can respond differently when it comes to dating and romance, with some not experiencing attraction or romantic feelings at all.
No matter how you find yourself feeling, however, it can be freeing to understand that your cumulative life experience can make your later-in-life dating experience fresh and new—rather than overwhelming.
Here are some additional tips that can help when or if you’re ready to enter the dating pool.
You may be surprised that this must be said, but many people may try to present themselves as a "better" version of themselves when they're on a date with someone new. The problem with this is that if you hit it off, they might eventually see the real you — which can lead to feelings of surprise and concern that this wasn’t the side you were showing in the first place. Plus, you can deprive yourself of the acceptance and support that many crave, which you deserve simply by being yourself.
In short? It can be better to be honest about who you are so that you can match up with a person who is compatible with the real you.
Trust Your Instincts In Dating
Whether you're getting a feeling that something just isn't right in the situation, or you feel “struck by magic” and get along with this person right from the start, you can benefit from trusting those feelings. Your gut often knows what it's doing.
It can be helpful to remember that if things feel too good to be true, it's not a bad idea to step back and take a logical look at the situation. Additionally, if you feel ready to go all-in, you may just walk away with a lifelong connection that you’ll value.
Ask Questions On Dates
If you’re on a date, feel free to ask about the things that are important to you. It can keep the conversation going, and it can help you to determine whether this is a person you'd like to spend more time with.
Additionally, when a person answers your questions, consider listening to them closely. You may benefit from simply believing that they are telling you the truth, even if the answer is one you don't want to hear.
You might also try to ask the important questions. That can include asking about topics such as their financial standing, relationship goals and life goals. This can save you both a lot of time, and can help you determine if you both are a good fit.
Many older people who are dating might have a lot of standards they want to be met with a potential partner. This can be because they often have the life experience to know what they want and what they do not want. This means that you might want to take your time, making sure that you’re choosing the right person to spend time with.
Don't Tolerate Disrespect
If someone seems patronizing or disrespectful to you on a first date, you can thank them and end the date. First dates are usually when people try to make their best impression, so if they're disrespectful this early on, it can be helpful to acknowledge that their behavior may not improve over time.
Examples of disrespect can include being condescending about your career or life choices, or outright being derogatory or rude. However, any remarks that can make you feel guilty or uncertain about yourself can be signs that this person is disrespecting you. You generally always retain the right to leave an unhealthy situation and seek a love that you deserve—free of behavior like this.
Look For Someone Similar to You
While some differences can balance people out or help each person to enhance their strengths or mitigate their weaknesses, it can be helpful to place equal focus on finding a mate that aligns well with similarities.
Be Positive About Senior Dating
Being optimistic and unafraid of making connections that could turn into dating opportunities can help you to navigate senior dating with confidence. Consider approaching someone to talk—it likely can't hurt, and it might turn into a pleasant conversation (even if they're not a potential match).
Consider Internet Dating
Internet dating can have its pros and cons. You might try online dating to begin your dating adventures, as striking up a conversation online can allow you to talk to someone with less risk of embarrassment. This can be especially true if you don't know the person yet—giving you ample opportunity to forge new connections in your own unique way.
Not sure where to start? You can try finding someone interesting to talk to, and practice asking them first date type questions. Who knows, that online conversation may turn into an in-person first date!
Make Eye Contact With People
Eye contact can be a simple way to gauge interest and start conversation. For example: If you meet someone's gaze and they smile, you can try to begin a conversation. You can then mutually determine if you want the conversation to continue, or if you wish to pursue a relationship with the other person.
Removing Expectations: Limiting Fear About Senior Dating
Expectations can limit your dating experience, especially expectations around others’ behavior. That’s why it’s generally best to try to keep your expectations under control if you’re meeting someone for a first date.
While it can be normal to have some expectations around your experience, you may find that you benefit most by keeping expectations neutral.
Simply put, if you don't assume these things; it can be a wonderful surprise if they happen. And not expecting them can help to mitigate your disappointment if they don't.
Standards Vs. Expectations: What’s The Difference?
It can be helpful to understand that dating expectations are not necessarily the same thing as dating standards. While many may believe that one should certainly have a set of standards you are looking for in a potential partner, expectations can limit the possibilities for some. Remaining open-minded can open the door for many to have new and impactful emotional experiences.
Where To Meet People
You may be wondering: Where do you meet potential dates?
For many, the best way could be just to do the things you would do anyway. Using this method, you can go places you love to go—possibly meeting other enthusiasts and likeminded people in the process.
For example: If a healthy lifestyle is important to you, the gym may be a good place for you to look for people to talk to. You can still be respectful of their workout time while remaining open to opportunity, especially if you find yourself in conversation.
Alternatively, if you prefer intellectual stimulation, bookstores and museums may be good places to go. You can also try special interest groups or fairs.
How Online Therapy Can Help
Dating can feel difficult at any age. If you're feeling overwhelmed or need help finding yourself before you find someone else, you can consider enlisting the help of a professional therapist to keep you optimistic and on the right path.
Online therapy can be convenient in this context, as it can allow you to check in from anywhere with an internet connection—whether that be home, the office or elsewhere. It can also be more reachable than in-person methods for people who have mobility issues or who simply can’t find the time to take off work and make it to a doctor’s office in person.
Several clinical studies have been published with details that suggest that online therapy can be just as effective (and sometimes even more effective) compared to in-person therapy methods.
Many people who participate in online therapy have expressed that they find it easier to open up over online mediums due to the extra level of separation that can exist between the person and the therapist.
You may find success entering the dating pool later on, empowering you to experience people in more mature age groups. Online therapy can be a helpful resource to you as you navigate this new season and can be reached through your smart device. BetterHelp can connect you with a therapist in your area of need.
How do I find senior singles in my area?
You can often find senior singles in your area by signing up for reputable senior dating sites or dating apps. Many of these sites offer a safe and complete online dating experience that allows you to filter searches by location. As a result, you can meet singles close to you. You can also look for features like a free basic membership to start.
What's the best dating site for people over 60?
The best dating sites for people over 60 are those made specifically for mature dating. Other features to look for might include a user-friendly interface and a free version to try out the service. You can search for positive reviews of the site and whether they have a reputation for safe and effective dating for seniors.
What is the safest online dating site for seniors?
The safest online dating website for seniors is one that has strong policies and safety features in place. A reputable dating site often offers tips on how to date safely and use protective measures to protect its users' safety.
Are there any good dating sites for seniors?
Yes, there are several good dating sites for seniors that provide a paid membership. Paid memberships often include additional features and a more tailored online dating service. You can look for senior dating websites that are highly rated by users and have a proven track record of connecting seniors to one another.
How do single seniors meet new friends?
Single seniors can meet new friends through various methods like community activities or clubs. In addition, online dating services and mobile apps are available to help people connect and expand their social circles.
How do I meet senior men in my area?
To meet senior men in your area, you can consider using senior dating websites or mobile apps designed for senior dating. These platforms can help you find local individuals who you have common interests with and are looking for companionship.
Where is the best place for seniors to meet?
The best place for seniors to meet can vary and depend on interests and hobbies. Many find success through local community centers or events. Others may prefer senior dating sites, which often have a friendly community of like-minded individuals looking for friendship and love.
How do I find a partner at 70?
Finding a partner at 70 can be a rewarding experience with the help of the best senior dating sites that specialize in connecting people of a similar age group. These sites recognize the nuances of mature dating and offer tools and resources for finding a compatible partner.
How much does Mature Singles Only cost?
The cost for the Mature Singles Only platform can vary, depending on whether you opt for a free basic membership or a paid subscription. Typically, paid memberships offer more features and a more complete online dating experience. The plans can also vary based on the length of the subscription.
How to find a man after 60?
You may be able to find a man after 60 by registering on a seniors dating online service or app. Create a genuine profile, connect with the community, and use the site's features to connect with potential partners who you have common interests and values.
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