By Danni Peck
Updated January 02, 2019
Reviewer Laura Angers
Being lonely sucks. Chances are if you're lonely you've spent hours on tumblr, gone out alone only to leave 15 minutes in because you're the "single pringle" in a room of couples, and the radio has become your best friend. For most people who struggle to express themselves and want communication music is a bridge. Songs can create and soothe our emotions in many ways, and when you're lonely, they're a good way of not being "on your own" as much because it seems like the singer is reaching into your heart and saying exactly what you feel.
Eleanor Rigby - The Beatles
THE classic about loneliness. A song about different people and their shared loneliness. One of the things that loneliness often creates is isolation and a feeling that you're separate yet all the people in the story are alone yet the same because they're all going through it together. It's also an illustration that all these visible people, like the priest, may not seem alone but are lonely. It's a hint that maybe you should reach out and ask people how they're doing even if you're not that close if they seem lonely.
Especially in situations where people are happy (the wedding mentioned), it can be difficult to see beyond those moments - people come together but after they've left life goes on, and in the case of Eleanor Rigby all she has left behind is the rice on the floor where the wedding was. It's a powerful image because we all know how busy and happy weddings are yet the empty church following them is an antithesis.
YES - Owner of a Lonely Heart
In true 80's style, this is far from the sad crying ballad of loneliness. This is about someone who is alone, but they are strong in that instead of being sad about it. This is about taking a second chance on love even when you've been hurt before. Many people who are lonely are scared to reach out and create relationships which might stop them being lonely. They've been hurt before, instead choosing to remain alone, rather than risk being hurt again and possibly worse.
This is a power song for people who are lonely because it shows that there is strength in their isolation and that having the ability to isolate themselves means they're stronger than any hurt which means they should give love another try.
Eric Pasley - She doesn't love you
Many people who are lonely choose to settle for filling the hole. The person they're with may not be right for them and may not even be good for them but rather than being alone and feeling isolated their craving for human interaction means that they will cling to anyone to prevent going back to it. Loneliness is often a feeling that has nothing to do with being alone, something else emphasized in the song. Often people find "the one," and it doesn't work out and every relationship after that will always be compared yet never measure up. It talks about forgiveness for a person who is trying to move on but is haunted by the shadows of that failure and is fighting their loneliness with that relationship.
Charles Kelley - Lonely Girl
The other side of Eric Pasley's song comes from the person on the other side of the relationship with a person who is lonely but trying. Often it's hardest on the partner because they are unable to help or "fix" the issue because to the lonely partner they're simply not the right person. What this song shows is that while someone is bogged down in being lonely, there may be someone who can fix that right in front of them if they will only look their way.
It's a common problem these days that many women experience when their relationships go wrong that the "right" person may be right there already to fix the situation, but they're not looking at them. Many times we don't realize how lonely we are or that we even are the lonely person in the song because we're trying.
Blaine Larsen - How Do You Get That Lonely
Suicide is a very real risk for people who are lonely, especially when their loneliness is connected with traumatic events like a breakup. Many suicidal people isolate themselves and avoid reaching out because of depression. Depression creates isolation because people who are often suffering think they're better not interacting with other people or that by being gone they will no longer be a burden to those around them.
This song is very emotional because it talks about a stranger seeing from the outside and wondering how someone could reach that level of desperation. There are approximately 123 suicides per day, with many having multiple unsuccessful attempts before succeeding. It is the 10th cause of death in the US yet is very preventable, unlike many illnesses.
If you think someone may be suicidal, it's very important to reach out and check on them, if you are feeling suicidal there are many places you can reach out to get help even if that's finding someone to talk to about what you're feeling. Sites like BetterHelp have directories of therapists so you can choose someone who will work for you rather than waiting until it is too late. Often it is the depression that makes you imagine you're alone when in reality many people around you are willing to reach out.
Backstreet Boys - Show Me The Meaning of Being Lonely
A 90s classic, at some point we will all lose loved ones, and this song illustrates how it feels for people who have lost someone they loved through death and how it physically tears something from their heart while life goes on around them. When a person dies the grieving process can often stretch for years, and in some cases, a person may never get over the loss of a loved one. Grief counseling can help patients to work through their feelings of loss and learning how to live in a world where "something is missing" because the loss has fundamentally changed it.
In the video, the girl in question commits suicide, another powerful outcome of loneliness. Death can leave loved ones feeling lonely themselves.
Greenday - Boulevard of Broken Dreams
Many people who are lonely have trouble sleeping and often find themselves wandering. It's a poignant image that is easily relatable - the lone stranger wandering the streets in the dark. The lyrics include an interesting part that many songs about loneliness miss - it's all in mind.
Most people who are lonely try to reach out but suffer mentally when they do because they're failing to connect even when attempting to be social. Being antisocial and struggling to be social are things that often need therapy and cannot be fixed without help. It's important if you are struggling with reaching out and feel that your loneliness is getting worse that you get help.
Being antisocial is not a precursor to being lonely. It's a common sentiment among the younger generations today that they simply don't like being around other humans. The issue with this is that with less interaction we're damaging our ability to connect at all.
Cole Swindell - Hope You Get Lonely Tonight
Another song about reaching out. While the girl in the song isn't lonely to the depths that many people are her experiences - sitting in the club alone, walking aimlessly, are all something lonely people can empathize with. The singer wants her to reach out because he wants to be there for her. In the song, he's trying to help her and stop her being lonely, something that many people who are lonely don't have but desperately needs. They will want to reach out but perhaps not have anyone to reach out to.
Unfortunately, part of the song also illustrates that people who are lonely sometimes reach out to the wrong people who only leave them feeling even more lonely - "You don't have to wake up and miss me." The singer is saying he won't be there for her in the morning and she'll wake up on her own to feel her loneliness once more.
This is a fear of many people who are lonely, choosing to remain alone rather than reaching out because they don't believe the person will be there for them in future. Meaningless connections can be worse than no connections at all because of the disappointment and the fact that they may reinforce false ideas that the person is not worth being with.
Loneliness, grief, depression, breakups, and being antisocial are just a few of the reasons a person may be lonely. If you think someone you know is lonely reach out to them, they will appreciate it and in cases of suicide doing so may even save their life. Help is out there, and seeking professional help for a problem like loneliness can stop it from becoming worse.