Love Words To Win Anyone Over

Updated November 3, 2022 by BetterHelp Editorial Team

If I could rearrange the alphabet, I would put U and I together. Do your legs hurt from running through my dreams all night? Are you from Starbucks? Because I like you a latte.

Many of us have heard cheesy pickup lines before, and they’re certainly showing staying power in the age of Tinder. However, if you want to find the right love words to win that special someone over, you will likely want to avoid using these kinds of lines.

While pickup lines might be funny to hear, but they are not generally what people who are being courted want to hear. They lack romance and can generally seem immature. Plus, they often pale in comparison to other factors, such as attractiveness or intelligence. Nonetheless, there are certain words that are much more likely to win over others. But how do you find the perfect things to say? Should you try different pick up lines or maybe go a more uplifting route and try words of encouragement for women to compliment her?

It would be nice if there were a magic formula you could learn to win someone over, but it just doesn’t work that way. Instead, you’ll need to put in some hard work.

Read on to learn more about how you can use language to win over someone’s heart. 

Remember That Everyone Wants Different Love Words

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What works for one person might not work on another. That means that when you take advice from someone else, including from this article, you need to think about how it will work specifically for the person you are thinking of.

You also need to remember that what worked for a past significant other won’t necessarily work on the next one. If you want to use love words for that special someone, you need to make sure that you are choosing words specifically for them. No one likes knowing or feeling like you are recycling words on them that you used on someone else.

You Need To Be Genuine

People generally don’t want to be fed phony lines. They want you to be genuine in what you say. It’s better to say fewer things, but they are genuine, than to say many things that are not. Don’t just tell them what you think they want to hear because in the end that will not help you at all. Instead, do your best to put into words how you feel. Don’t try to be over the top or corny to make it more comfortable or light. Just be honest.

Give Them Compliments

Most people love compliments. It’s always nice to hear someone say something nice about what they like and appreciate about you, or what they think you do well. If you want to find the right love words to win this person over, talk to them about themselves. Build them up. Shower them with compliments, but don’t be fake about it or overdo it. The compliments need to be things you genuinely think are good about them or else it isn’t going to matter.

Be Intentional And Consistent

Don’t tell them how you feel one time and then leave it at that. Don’t think that a one-time thing is going to win them over for good. 

People generally aren’t looking to spend their life with someone who will do one nice thing for them and then think it’s good for a while. They want consistency, and someone who genuinely cares and shows it.

Be A Good Listener

A large part of communication is in listening rather than talking. While you might be working so hard to come up with the right love words for this person that will show them how you feel, you may end up forgetting to properly listen as they are speaking.

The more you listen, the more you are going to learn about them and what they like and don’t like, as well as what they need. This will help you determine the right things to do and say to win them over. Ask lots of question. You want to know their opinion on different matters. Moreover, while they answer you, lean into the conversation and show them that you are listening.

Shout It From The Rooftops

Tell your family, tell your friends, tell their friends and family. People talk, and it will get back to them that you were talking about how great they are and how you feel about them. This may be meaningful to them because it means that you’re not just telling them this for flattery. It also goes a long way in building a good relationship with their family and friends as well. Sometimes that’s all it takes to win her over. However, doing this before you know her very well could be too much too soon. Go with your gut and what you know about her to determine whether or not this is a good approach. You could also ask her if she likes it when love interests are very open with others about their thoughts and feelings regarding her.

Use Someone Else’s Words

If you are really struggling to find the right words to say, use the words of someone else.

People generally appreciate hearing nice quotes or poems from other people as long as you don’t try and pass them off as your own. If you get caught doing this, it doesn’t look good on your part at all. 

Notice The Small Things

When you are trying to find the right words to communicate how you feel, it’s vital that you notice the little things. This goes along with complimenting, which was discussed earlier. When a person knows that you notice the little things, it lets them know how much they really mean to you. Not everyone notices the way they twirl their fingers in their hair when they’re thinking, for example, but when you notice it and tell her how much you like it, it is likely to stand out to her.

Offer Words Of Encouragement

Love words are not just about complimenting them on their physical appearance or behavior. You can also win them over by giving words of encouragement. Everyone wants to be with someone who believes in them and their abilities. Be optimistic about the things that they’re working on and want to accomplish and help to keep them motivated.

Let them know that you care about the dreams that they have for their life and that you want to help and see them accomplish them. This will let them know that you value them as a person.

Surprise Them With Notes

Speaking love words is generally something that people will appreciate, but don’t forget to write them down, as well. While love letters may seem like a thing of the past because of modern technology, there is still something special about taking the time to write down how you feel for a person. It shows that you invested time and were thinking of them when they weren’t there.

You can do this as one longer letter, or by breaking it down into smaller notes. Look for creative ways to tell them too. You could send a letter in the mail or leave sticky notes all around the house.

It Truly Is The Simple Things

If you have been stuck on trying to come up with the perfect love words, chances are you have probably been searching online for articles and advice. There are a lot of them out there. However, they’re not all filled with good ideas. There are many lists that include phrases and things that you should say to someone to win them over, but to many people these are just going to sound like cheesy pickup lines.

Instead, focus on telling them the small things. Tell them that you love the way it feels when their head is on your shoulder, or their hand is in yours. Let them know that you miss them when they’re not there and that seeing them makes a bad day so much better.

That might mean more to them than any long love letter, even if it’s elegantly written, because these small acts are likely to occur more regularly than a love letter.

Remember It’s Not Just About The Words

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You may be focused on love words, but don’t forget to think about your actions as well. There’s an old saying that actions speak louder than words, and that holds true in your relationship as well. If you want to win them over, it might not be about the words that you’re saying. It might be more about what you’re communicating by your actions.

You could have the perfect words to say, but if you aren’t treating this person right, it isn’t going to matter. At the end of the day, words are just words. It’s your actions that they will remember. So, work hard to make sure that your actions and words are communicating to them how important they are to you and how much you want to be with them.


If you struggle to speak to people you’re attracted to, it makes it that much harder to try to win them over. There are many reasons why people find it hard to talk to others. It could be that they deal with low self-esteem and struggle with confidence, or it could be that they have been hurt before and are afraid of being hurt again, or that they have an anxiety disorder.

Sometimes it can be hard to pinpoint what the issue may be. However, a licensed, experienced therapist like those at BetterHelp can help you work through the underlying cause(s). Moreover, since the services are offered online, it makes it convenient to make the progress that you are looking for, even from the comfort of your own home (or wherever you have an internet connection!).

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