Ways To Show Your Wife Love

Medically reviewed by Karen Foster, LPC
Updated February 21, 2024by BetterHelp Editorial Team

It may not always be easy to show your wife that you love her. However, there can be many ways to express your feelings effectively. You might try romantic gestures, surprises, and expressing your love physically or with words. If it’s challenging for you to talk about your feelings and show your love, you may benefit from therapy. It can be easy to find a suitable therapist in your local area or online.

Please note that although this article focuses on ways to show your wife you love her, the suggestions below can apply to people of any gender.

Romantic gestures

Are you having difficulties expressing love?

Buy them flowers, jewelry, or other gifts

If you’d like to show your wife or wife your love, you might find out what her favorite flowers are and buy them a bouquet. It can be helpful to also pay attention to the type of jewelry or clothing they wear, as well as any items they seem to linger over when the two of you are out. Paying attention to your partner’s needs and likes can make it easy to pick out small gifts that will show them you care. 

Surprise them with a dance

If you pull your wife close, put on a slow song, and dance with them, you will likely have them swooning just like when you first met.

Write your wife a love letter

This may be simple, but it can be highly effective. Try to communicate your honest feelings and use specific examples instead of generic statements. “I love that you are so joyful, like the other day when I saw you looking out the window at the birds and smiling,” is typically better than, “You are so beautiful.” One of the nice things about a written love letter is that your wife can keep it and reread it again and again. If your wife’s love language is words of affirmation, they may particularly appreciate this display of love.

Recreate your first date

Recreating your first date can be a romantic gesture that may bring back the feelings you and your wife had during the honeymoon stage of your relationship.

Dream about the future together

Talking about where you see your relationship going in the future or discussing joint goals and how you’ll reach them can be a wonderful bonding experience.

Surprise your wife

A little surprise can go a long way when it comes to love and romance. Planning a surprise could be just the thing to do to show your love.

Here are some ideas to get you started:

  • If you have children, you might arrange for a babysitter and plan an entire night out. You could take your wife to her favorite restaurant or try a fun new activity together. 
  • Do some of the housework without them having to ask. It can be incredibly sexy to someone when her wife steps in and helps without being prompted to do so.
  • Contact one of her friends to help plan a friend’s night out or send them out with her friends to enjoy some time together.
  • Take your wife away for a weekend to a romantic location. 
  • Bring her favorite take-out home for dinner as a surprise. Better yet, if they usually cook, make dinner for them one evening.
  • Fill her car up with gas, take it through the wash, and vacuum it.

Do what they want to do

  • Encourage her to pursue her dreams. Find out exactly what your wife’s big dreams or goals are and support them as they research the steps they need to take to start pursuing them. Try to cheer them on every step of the way.
  • Enter her world and participate in the activities that interest them. This may be through a class, an activity, or social connections with others.

Express your love physically

If you want to communicate love for your wife, then it’s often beneficial to learn how they like to be touched in intimate and affectionate ways. Many people love hugs, forehead kisses, and back rubs. However, you generally aren’t going to know unless you ask. Once you know what her favorite type of affection is, you can show how much you love them by doing it.

  • Give them a back rub
  • Rub her feet
  • Focus on her intimate pleasure as much as your own
  • Pay for them to get a massage, pedicure, or manicure, or treat them to an entire day at the spa
  • Kiss them like you used to

Just say it

Sometimes we can get so caught up in trying to creatively communicate our love that we forget to say the words. Letting your wife know you love them can be as simple as telling them.
  • Say how much you love them when others are present. It can make your wife feel extra-special when you don’t just tell them you love them, but you communicate it to family and friends as well.
  • Leave them romantic notes around the house or in her car.
  • Give them compliments. Tell them how great they look, what a hard worker they are, and how much you appreciate them.
  • Tell them what first made you fall in love with them, and then follow it up with what you continue to love about them.
Are you having difficulties expressing love?

Communicate your love to others

One of the best ways to show your wife that you love them can be to set healthy and clear boundaries for your relationship. Having a trusting relationship can strengthen love for both partners. Another way to demonstrate that you love your wife is often with your own family. If you want to show your wife how much you love them, you might communicate clear and appropriate boundaries with your family.

Learn to express your love in therapy

For some people, it can be difficult to talk about their feelings and express their love for others. If this is the case for you, working with a licensed therapist can help you address the root of this difficulty and discover effective strategies for sharing your love with the people you care about. Online therapy can make this process particularly easy and convenient, as you can be matched with a suitable therapist in just a couple of days and can schedule online sessions at a time that fits into your schedule.

As one study explains, online therapy generally has the same rate of effectiveness as traditional in-office therapy. If you believe you’d benefit from working with a mental health professional, please don’t hesitate to reach out for the help and guidance you deserve.


There can be many ways to show your wife that you love them, ranging from words and physical affection to surprises and romantic gestures. If you have trouble showing your love, it may be beneficial to work through this challenge with a licensed therapist in person or online.
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