Be Radiant: What To Do When A Guy Ignores You

By Patricia Oelze

Updated December 10, 2018

You've checked your phone five times in the past five minutes, but he still hasn't responded. You're so into him, but he just doesn't seem to be feeling it. As much as you hate to admit it, there seems to be a pattern: you keep reaching out to him and he keeps ignoring you. You feel like something's wrong with you. What do you do when a guy ignores you?


The trouble with being ignored is that nagging question: What did I do wrong? If you are feeling icky and have lost a morsel of self-esteem because of his silence, here's what to do.

  1. Realize that it may not be about you.

Everyone has a past, usually riddled with relationship drama. Maybe he has just gotten out of a relationship and doesn't feel ready for something new. It could be that he is into you, and he's afraid. Even so, give him the space he needs. If you have made it clear that you're interested, he will eventually pursue you if he's feeling it. The key is to not turn his silence into something more than it actually is. Instead of inventing a story of how you did this or that wrong, simply accept his silence for what it is.


  1. Don't act desperate.

Here's what you absolutely need to avoid: acting desperate. As much as you hate it when somebody double, triple, and quadruple texts you, messages you on Facebook, and comes to your apartment parking lot carrying a boombox and singing a love song, don't do that to this guy. First of all, his actions demonstrate that he doesn't deserve you and most important of all, you must preserve your dignity.

  1. Recognize his flaws.

It is human nature to love the chase. When a guy ignores you, he suddenly becomes more appealing than he would've been otherwise. Take a moment to recognize his flaws (number one might be his silence). Maybe he isn't as adventurous as you are. Maybe he doesn't have his own car or maybe he's still living with his parents. Nobody is perfect, and if you recognize his flaws, you will be able to move on better. After all, even if he didn't ignore you, it might not have been a good match. Look on the bright side - maybe he saved you future from heartache!


  1. Understand that there's a lot of fish in the sea.

The plethora of online dating sites makes one thing blaringly obvious: there are a lot of fish in the sea. So, it didn't work out with this guy - put yourself back out there. Don't sit and wallow in embarrassment. Never self-pity. The bottom line is that in your pursuit to find "the one," you will encounter many who are not "the one." Don't let them sidetrack you.

  1. Be radiant.

Contrary to mainstream opinion, there is no perfect picture of being radiant. Invent your own radiance, and you will be utterly irresistible. When you discover your authentic self and allow it to shine through, others will be attracted to your uniqueness and confidence. The sad fact is that only few people are their authentic selves. You will stand out from the crowd when you are authentic, genuine, and radiant.


  1. See an online counselor to discuss what to do when a guy ignores you.

Overcoming rejection is not easy. But an online counselor is a pro when it comes to sticky situations. If you are having trouble moving on from this guy, see an online therapist today!

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