How Online Therapy Helped Me Improve My Communication Skills

Are you curious about online therapy? Are you interested in becoming a better communicator? You may have tried in-person therapy before and disliked your experiences. Or perhaps you've avoided counseling because you feel confident that discussing your emotions face-to-face isn't for you. Whatever the case, you deserve to be happy with your treatment, and you may find remote sessions more enjoyable. 

For example, Kelsey found online sessions more effective than in-person counseling because she has an easier time writing about her emotions than talking about them, and BetterHelp therapy allows her to choose how she communicates with her provider. 

Kelsey's story has been lightly edited for grammar and clarity. 

Why Kelsey tried BetterHelp 

"I first learned of BetterHelp when I saw an advertisement online for it. I've attended in-person counseling twice in the past but was dissatisfied with both experiences," began Kelsey. "BetterHelp caught my eye because I liked the idea of being able to write to a counselor instead of just talking to one.” 

“I have a hard time verbalizing and speaking, especially my emotions. It’s much easier for me to express myself with the written word. So I thought this would be far more beneficial than seeking an in-person counselor again.

"When I previously attended in-person counseling, there were many times that I did not feel comfortable enough to verbalize and communicate what I wanted to say or how I was feeling to my counselor. And when I finally did open up, I felt as if the counselor would try to shift the topic of conversation to something else I may have brought up previously that was, to me, completely unrelated. They would make me deliberately repeat important points that I wasn’t comfortable talking about. It took a lot for me to open up about some of these topics, so to have them overlooked was frustrating. It made me feel like they weren’t genuinely interested in the issues I wanted to speak about."

Kelsey's experience with BetterHelp

"So, at that point, I decided to sign up for BetterHelp, and I'm so grateful I did! I have been working with my counselor, Alexandra, on BetterHelp for just over three months. She suggests different action-based plans. This helps me to feel as though I am doing something to truly work towards being in a better place with my situation," Kelsey continued. 

"I am not solely relying on an internal change, which is exactly what I need. There are still internal changes that I need to work on, and by doing these external action-based suggestions, it’s making it easier for me. I have learned to pay attention and listen to my needs and be patient with myself and not let my anxieties get so out of control."

How Kelsey benefited from the flexibility at BetterHelp

"I did try two other counselors on BetterHelp before being matched with Alexandra. I did not mesh with either of them and decided to request a new counselor.

"It is a much more complex process with in-person counseling to try and find one that works best for you. This was the main reason that I did not continue in-person counseling."

Kelsey's continued growth through BetterHelp

"Overall, I have discovered a lot of essential points about myself during my time with BetterHelp, and I am still learning more about who I am as a person. It’s going to be a struggle for a long time to get where I need to be, but it is no longer constant. I am continuously learning new ways to make productive and helpful changes in my everyday life.

"I am also learning to be a better communicator. From actively listening to body language, I’ve started learning a lot of things that make great communicators good at effective communication. A lot of the issues I had in my relationship stemmed from this one issue. I was never expressing myself or making my voice heard in conversation. Those unexpressed emotions would turn into anger and erupt, causing further issues in the relationship. I am learning to handle control (or feeling a lack of it), and I am learning how to cope and avoid misunderstandings thanks to Alexandra's support on BetterHelp," Kelsey concluded.

Communication struggles: More than just words

Now that you’ve read Kelsey’s story, you might be curious to learn more about becoming a better communicator in therapy. These next few sections will explore communication challenges, their possible side effects, and how therapy can be a valuable tool for overcoming them.

If you struggle to communicate, whether at work or with your family, you’re not alone. Mental health challenges, behavior patterns, and relationship dynamics can all affect various aspects of communication.  

We often carry our moods, individual biases, and thought patterns with us into our conversations, which can make a difference in how we interact with others. This can change how we perceive the information we’re receiving from another person, potentially limiting our ability to have an effective conversation. For instance, if you often feel anxious when you’re talking to your boss at work, you may have a harder time communicating openly with them or accurately absorbing what they say to you. 

Some examples of other common barriers to effective communication include:

• Misinterpretation of information
• Jumping to conclusions
• Mistrustful or negative relationships
• Challenges with listening skills
• Stress 
• Difficulty understanding nonverbal cues (such as expressions and gestures)
• Having a disorder that affects your executive function, such as ADHD or autism spectrum disorder
• Having a mental illness like social anxiety disorder

The impact of communication challenges

Communication challenges like the ones above can have effects that go beyond a single conversation. Struggling to effectively communicate your thoughts and feelings may make it harder for you to navigate the world and find a sense of connection to others. This, in turn, may contribute to feelings of isolation and loneliness, which have been associated with: 

• Depression
• Anxiety
• Heart disease
• Stroke
• Type II diabetes
• Dementia

How talk therapy can help you become a better communicator

While communication challenges might seem intimidating, Kelsey’s story shows how addressing them with a licensed mental health counselor may make them easier to manage. 

Licensed therapists typically have at least a master’s degree, and may specialize in using different forms of talk therapy, ranging from cognitive-behavioral therapy (CBT) to acceptance and commitment therapy (ACT), mindfulness-based therapy, and others. A trained therapist may be able to help you:

• Explore and reframe the thoughts and beliefs that might be interfering with your communication
• Understand and reflect on the negative emotions you might experience in communication-related situations
• Build confidence in your communication abilities
• Learn to assert yourself 
• Have clearer, more constructive conversations 

What to expect when working with a therapist

When you first start working with a new therapist, they will typically start by getting to know you and your individual needs. They may want to hear about what sorts of communication challenges you’ve encountered so far and how they’re affecting your daily life and well-being. Understanding your situation can help your therapist come up with an effective treatment plan. They may advise you to meet once a week or once a month, depending on your mental health needs.

Over the course of your therapy journey, your therapist will work to help you develop real-life skills for becoming a more effective communicator in the future. They may lead you through practice conversations, help you identify specific communication scenarios that cause you anxiety, or give you advice on how to communicate more assertively and confidently. 

The time it takes to see results from talk therapy can vary. While some clients may start to see a noticeable difference within the first month, others may need more time. The root causes of communication challenges are often deeply embedded and can take time to adjust, so remember to be patient with yourself, ask for feedback, and avoid putting pressure on yourself to force immediate change. 

Therapy alongside other treatments

While talk therapy is often a vital step toward better communication, it is not the only potential clinical treatment for communication challenges. For instance, if depression or anxiety is interfering with your ability to communicate effectively, a mental healthcare provider might recommend supplementing therapy with an antidepressant medication. Other complementary approaches that might accompany traditional therapy include: 

• Speech therapy (for individuals with a speech disorder or difficulty forming words)
• Art therapy
• Neurofeedback 
• EMDR or other trauma-informed treatments (for individuals with PTSD that’s affecting their communication)

Keep in mind that the right approach, or combination of approaches, might not be the same for you as for someone else. A mental health professional may be able to help you understand your options and recommend a more personalized treatment plan. 

Becoming a better communicator with online therapy

For most patients, online professionals provide the same benefits as in-person counseling, making them an effective alternative for users who feel uncomfortable in face-to-face therapy sessions. Online platforms typically use a subscription-based model rather than charging per session, which can also help reduce the cost of therapy compared to seeing a therapist in person. 

Source

Various types of therapy hold promise for improving communication, and many of these can be practiced online. For example, interpersonal therapy can help improve communication skills, help a person become a good communicator, and teach individuals healthy ways to express their emotions. Therapy may also help individuals overcome their fears of speaking in front of an audience and give them the tools they need to ensure listeners hear what they have to say. Using an online platform, you can learn these skills from the comfort of your home, communicating with your therapist in whatever way is most comfortable for you.

How online therapy works in practice

Online therapy can make mental health treatment more affordable, convenient, and available, allowing you to connect with a broader range of professionals than you might be able to locally. So, if you'd like an alternative to speaking with a therapist in person, consider trying an online platform. Like Kelsey and many other individuals, it may be a better option for you. 

BetterHelp is an affordable online therapy platform that will match you with a licensed professional based on your needs and preferences, with the option to switch therapists as often as you need until you find a good fit. You’ll then be able to schedule live sessions at a time that fits your schedule. Therapy can take place over chat, voice chat, or live video sessions, offering the ability to pick the format that’s most comfortable for you. In-app messaging options allow you to reach out to your provider anytime, and they'll respond as soon as they're free, which may also be helpful if you encounter questions or challenges between sessions.