I Now Know That I Am Capable Of Doing Anything I Put My Mind To - Sara

Many people who have never tried therapy may wonder how therapy can benefit them. This was the case for Sara, who before trying online therapy with BetterHelp had always managed to move on from challenges with help from her friends. But when she encountered a situation that she couldn’t move on from on her own, she decided it was time for professional treatment. Since then, she's seen growth and improvement in several areas of her life. 

Stories like Sara's are common among many individuals trying therapy for the first time. Keep reading to see how her therapy sessions changed her idea of what counseling could offer and how it’s helping her grow her self-confidence. 

Sara's story

Sara's experiences before BetterHelp 

"Before joining BetterHelp, I had never received any type of counseling. There have been times in my past when I experienced depressing feelings due to bad experiences with certain people or situations. However, I had always managed to eventually pick myself up and move on with the help of my friends," Sara explained. 

“I've also always had a high level of discomfort speaking to 'strangers' (which is what a counselor would be to me) about my issues face-to-face. I guess I had never come to a point where I felt the urgent need to confess my feelings to someone I wasn’t familiar with.

“However, for the first time ever, I was not able to come out of a really depressing situation by myself. I was feeling really bad and saw no other solution than to actually talk to an expert about my issues because the feelings surpassed anything I was able to handle myself or with the help of those around me. 

“I came across an ad for BetterHelp and decided it was time to speak to an expert. Knowing that BetterHelp was really inexpensive, and that I didn't have to face the person or leave the comfort of my own home to go to therapy were definitely pros."

Sara’s growth and changes with BetterHelp

"I had been depressed and lost, coming out of a relationship, and I didn't know how to handle life. I was having panic attacks about how my future would look like regarding my financial independence," Sara continued. 

"Since I began working with my counselor, I have improved on taking things with much less pressure and stress, or at least I try to. It is always going to be hard for me to take things with ease since I am simply not that kind of person," explained Sara. "I still haven't figured everything out, yet with the counseling, I have gotten to a point where I realize how to take it one step after another. I try not to worry as much about it, which is something I still struggle with at times, but it has been getting progressively better."

"I have to reflect on what I have already accomplished in life and be proud of it, knowing I can only learn through my past mistakes and take them into consideration for the near future. Stressing myself out about things is only going to give me anxiety and is not going to contribute to my current problem-solving.

Sara's biggest achievement

"My biggest achievement is just being less stressed about certain situations and taking them with more of a sense of ease. I now know that I am capable of doing anything and that the right time will come for everything when I put effort into it. And even if it doesn't, everything happens for a reason," Sara concluded.

What does it mean to be capable?

Generally, if someone is capable, it means they have the skills and resources necessary to accomplish the task at hand. Other definitions associated with the word capable may include: 

• Self-sufficient
• Resourceful
• Competent
• Proficient
• Adept
• Skilled

The term “capable” can be used in various contexts, and it can mean different things to different people. 

Understanding your ability and inner power

In a broader sense, an individual’s capability might refer to the inner strength and power they have. When someone is capable, they have the ability to control themselves and their emotions in nearly any situation. Being capable might also mean rising to your true potential and being the best version of yourself as you navigate the world. 

Why capability is not fixed

Capability isn’t a fixed concept. Instead, it can fluctuate over time, and it might depend on a person’s current circumstances. Your sense of capability can also change depending on what you’re being challenged to accomplish. 

Why we forget what we are capable of

Sometimes, we forget the things we’re capable of. This isn’t a personal flaw; it’s the way the human brain is wired. Our brains are constantly organizing and prioritizing information so we can locate it efficiently. Skills and knowledge we don’t use on a regular basis may be harder to reach, making us feel less capable than we really are. Stress and symptoms of certain mental health conditions such as anxiety disorders can make things worse. 

Fear, past experiences, and self protection

Other factors influencing our sense of capability may include fear and reminders of past experiences, which often go hand in hand. We tend to remember particularly scary or upsetting events more readily than everyday occurrences. If we recall being afraid or suffering, the memories of fear or pain can make us feel less capable and more vulnerable than we would otherwise feel, causing our self-confidence to fall. This can make even simple tasks seem unbearable or out of reach. 

Taking action even when you doubt yourself

Self-doubt can be crippling, but you can overcome it by taking action. Try not to let your fears control your behavior. Once you push through to the other side, increased self-confidence will be your reward. That’s the beauty of persistence and determination. 

 Self discipline and small steps forward

Becoming more capable might require some degree of self-discipline. If you’re dealing with doubt or fear, take small steps forward until you start to build confidence. It’s not a matter of success or failure, but determined effort and progress. Remember that the lessons you learn through the process can only fuel future growth. 

Taking care of your mind and body

The better you care for yourself, the more capable you’ll feel. Consider being proactive about your self-care regimen, including: 

• Eating a balanced diet of nutritious food.
• Exercising regularly.
• Spending time in nature.
• Getting plenty of rest each night.
• Making time for activities you enjoy.
• Writing in a journal.
• Attending therapy sessions, online or in person.

Setting goals in online therapy 

One of the common misperceptions about therapy is that you must have a serious mental illness or be in a state of crisis to seek therapy. However, therapy can be a helpful resource for working on an array of issues in your life, such as:

• developing better communication and interpersonal skills.
• improving your self-esteem and self-acceptance.
• learning to change self-defeating habits and behaviors.

Whatever your goals are for therapy, online and in-person therapy have been shown to be equally effective for most patients. In one study of goal setting between patients and online therapists, it was found that when patients collaborated with their therapist to set goals, they were more likely to achieve them than those who set goals independently.  

Online therapy may offer unique benefits for people who have difficulties attending in-person sessions. For example, patients can attend online sessions from anywhere they have a stable internet connection and smart device. You can also choose to have conversations with your therapist via voice calls, video calls, or in-app messaging. This last option is available even between scheduled sessions, which can be helpful for checking in with your therapist about your weekly progress.