10 Conversation Topics To Bring Up With A Romantic Interest
It may feel intimidating to get a conversation rolling with someone you’re romantically interested in, and you may worry that you won’t have things to talk about. You might see this reflected in media that shows subjects sweating, stumbling over their words, and acting uncomfortably when speaking with a love interest. As some may know, this bodily response can be a natural occurrence before you start talking.
Pop culture and social media may make it seem like interesting conversations are hard to have, however, there are some ways to help make the conversation enjoyable for everyone. If you're learning how to talk to a boy or a girl effortlessly in real life, it may be beneficial to have a few conversation starters ready and know what to talk about when these nervous interactions arise. Topics to talk about with a boy or girl may vary based on culture, interests, and age, having a few in mind may be a good idea. With practice, you may become more comfortable and confident in approaching others. Having a great conversation starter can help to get the conversation flowing. Consider the following ten conversation topics to bring up with any romantic interest.
Talking with a romantic interest 101
Getting to know someone before dating is important, if a potential partner will demand extravagant things, or if they have had rocky past relationships, it might be good to know before starting a new relationship. Before the ten conversation topics, below are a couple of general tips for potentially keeping a calm and focused mindset while speaking with someone you’re genuinely interested in.
Be yourself
At times, societal expectations may cause us to believe that we must act a certain way and most guys or girls may put on a particular “mask” to impress others. This temptation may be present at all stages of life. However, if you are keen on impressing someone, you might find yourself speaking in ways that aren’t true to yourself.
However, people are often more intuitive than we may believe, and others can often pick up on inauthenticity. Studies show that first impressions can play a large part in whether a relationship succeeds. If this is someone you’d like to date in the future, you may base the time you spend with this person on forming a genuine connection instead of a false first impression.
Feeling calm in social situations may feel difficult. Consider focusing on the other person through techniques of active listening. If you struggle with eye contact, you might try pretending to look past the person’s head, or focus on the bridge of their nose, instead of looking directly in their eyes.
Accepting who you are and not trying to hide any aspect of yourself may also radiate a casual and relaxed self-confidence that others are drawn to and may trigger funny conversations that leave you both with a good laugh, which can increase your connection to each other.
Build your self-confidence
Many people find confidence attractive. Confidence can be something you build up over time and is a skill you can learn in your free time which may help to keep a girl or guy interested in learning more.
Ask yourself what makes you feel most confident. Reflect on that question and maximize your time doing things that build up your self-image. Prioritize people who make you feel good about who you are. Confidence can be built from challenging ourselves and overcoming those challenges. You can then project your confidence with open, comfortable, confident body language cues.
Ask yourself about your goals and make an organized plan to achieve them. You may someday find yourself so wrapped up in making your dreams a reality that talking to a romantic interest feels easy compared to the other exciting things in your life.
10 topics to discuss with a guy you're interested in
If you’re going to have a conversation with a romantic interest, you may benefit from using funny, relaxed, and kind conversation starters.
If you struggle with social anxiety or worry about what to say in a conversation, these ten topics may be a good conversation starter that you can discuss with someone you’d like to get to know better romantically and may leave a good impression that leads to future plans for a date.
1. Their interests
Consider asking about the person’s interests or about other interesting topics the person may enjoy. You don’t need to pry, overly personal questions, or push someone to answer things they aren’t comfortable discussing. However, many individuals enjoy talking more about themselves and asking questions shows that you have a genuine interest in getting to know them better.
If they trust you enough to talk about their interests, return the favor by making eye contact, paying close attention, and asking follow-up questions. This opportunity may help you learn something new and determine if you have shared interests. Because it’s something they enjoy, they may speak about it freely, even without being prompted. By actively listening to someone, you may also pick up on who they are and what makes them light up.
Here are some open-ended questions to start a conversation about someone’s interests:
- Do you have a current passion project?
- Are you a sports fan? If so, who’s your favorite athlete and why?
- How do you spend your time outside of work or school?
- Do you have any hobbies?
- Are you a dog or cat person?
- Do you have a favorite class or teacher? Why?
- What is your dream job?
- When you were young, what did you want to be when you grew up?
- What is your favorite thing in the world?
- What kinds of current events are you most interested in?
- What is your fashion sense?
2. Vacations, trips, or weekends
Many people meet in school, at work, or online, and it may be hard to move away from those more serious conversation topics onto something new. You can get to know them outside of those contexts by asking about how they spend their leisure time on vacation, traveling, or even on weekends.
Here are some conversation starters in this area:
- What did you do this weekend?
- Are you going on vacation this year? Who are you going with?
- Do you like to travel?
- Where is your dream vacation?
- On vacation, do you want to relax, or are you more active?
3. Siblings and family
Asking about siblings can be casual at first, but it may lead to more personal conversations later. If you don’t know each other very well yet, then you can keep this topic general, then only lead to more specific questions once you know them better.
- Do you have any siblings? Are you the oldest or the youngest?
- Do you have a sibling you’re closest with?
- Did you like being an only child?
- Which of your parents did you influence your personality?
- What were you like as a kid?
- Do you have a favorite childhood memory?
- Do you have a funny story from your childhood?
4. Goals
Not everyone has a five-year plan. However, asking about short-term and long-term goals may help you get an idea of what’s important to someone. When they talk about their goals, try to be encouraging. They may realize they can come to you for emotional support.
If you can use actual examples from things you’ve noticed about them, then it can make for a very warm, well-timed compliment. For instance, if they tell you that they want to study history, you could say, “I think you would be very good at that. I’ve always thought you were very analytical and intuitive.”
You may ask the following questions:
- What’s your plan for the next year?
- Do you have any specific career goals?
- Are you working on any cool projects?
5. Upcoming events in your area
If you live near your romantic interest, cool events may be happening nearby that you can discuss, like a fair, a movie premier, a concert, or a dance. You may ask them if they plan on going.
Talking about the types of events you enjoy could also be a gateway to asking someone on a date or going to the event together with friends.
6. Mutual friends
Talking to someone you’re romantically interested in one-on-one may feeling pressuring at times. A possible way to ease into getting to know each other can be hanging out in larger groups first.
Ask the person about their group of friends or their best friend. If you already have friends, invite them into your group. With more friends around, they may feel more comfortable opening up, which could provide more conversation starters.
7. Mutual projects
Some people may be less chatty than others. They may enjoy different ways of learning about someone new. For example, some people like to get to know you by doing something together rather than talking about things together.
If that’s the case, you might invite them to play your favorite sports game with your friends or to work on a school project together. With activities like these, you can potentially spend time together without putting too much importance on the conversation itself.
8. Food
Food can be fun to talk about since many people like it, and it may also be a relatively safe topic when you first get to know each other. Talk about restaurants in your area that you like and those that you don’t like.
Ask them what they like to cook and suggest your favorites. Since this is often a harmless topic, it may be a fun way to flirt. You might decide to spark a friendly or joking debate about a food you don’t like or challenge them to a cook-off for a date night.
9. Music
Do you use an app to listen to music and save your playlists? Ask to compare your music tastes to their tastes and check out what the other person listens to.
Talk about your favorite bands and ask to learn about theirs. Show them some music videos that you love. If you’re both music lovers, you could even make playlists for each other, catering to each person’s interests.
10. Movies and media
Is there a series that is quite popular right now? Ask them if they’ve seen it. Ask about a movie that you both saw so that you might discuss and analyze it. You may find hours of enjoyable conversation from talking about TV shows and movies that you both enjoy. Humor can be powerful and talking about funny movies or telling funny stories might be a good plan as laughter is an emotion that brings people together.
Work with a counselor
Sometimes, despite your best efforts to communicate and connect, symptoms of anxiety can get in the way. If you experience social anxiety, a counselor may give you insight on how to improve your social skills and manage anxiety.
If you’re not comfortable meeting a counselor in person, online therapy can be a valuable option. A study in Hong Kong found that internet-based cognitive therapy showed “highly promising” effectiveness in treating social anxiety. Talking to a therapist online is typically more affordable than talking to one in person, making the process available to many more people than in the past.
If you decide you’d like to try counseling, you can look through the databases of therapists available on sites like BetterHelp, which offers online counseling for a variety of concerns.
Takeaway
Talking to a romantic interest may be an excellent opportunity to get to know someone better. If you are experiencing some fear or anxiety about talking to someone new, you might choose to start working on your self-confidence, being genuine, and having conversation topics in mind beforehand.
If you are also interested in the insight of a mental health professional, consider reaching out and taking the first step.
How do you keep a conversation going with a guy?
Keeping a conversation going with a guy involves a combination of active listening, genuine interest, and engaging topics. Here are some tips to help you:
- Ask Open-Ended Questions: Instead of questions that can be answered with a simple yes or no, ask questions that encourage detailed responses and open the door for further discussion.
- Listen Actively: Pay close attention to his responses and show genuine interest. Respond to what he says, ask follow-up questions, and share your own thoughts related to the topic.
- Find Common Interests: Discover shared hobbies, interests, or experiences that you can both talk about. This provides a natural basis for conversation and the opportunity to talk about topics you are genuinely interested in.
- Use Humor: Light-hearted jokes and playful banter can keep the conversation fun and engaging in an interesting way.
- Share Stories: Share anecdotes from your life or interesting experiences. Personal stories often spark meaningful conversations.
- Discuss Current Events or Pop Culture: Talking about recent news, movies, music, or trends can provide a wide range of conversation topics.
- Talk About Future Plans: Discuss future aspirations, goals, and dreams. This can lead to deeper conversations and insights into each other's lives.
- Ask About His Opinion: Asking for his thoughts on various topics shows that you value his perspective and can lead to interesting conversations.
- Use Open Body Language: If you're chatting in person, maintain open and friendly body language to show that you're engaged and approachable.
- Be Yourself: Authenticity is key. Be true to your personality and interests instead of trying to impress or conform to his personal preferences.
- Be Patient: If there are pauses in the conversation, it's okay. Silence doesn't always mean the conversation is failing.
- Remember Previous Conversations: Referencing something he mentioned in an earlier conversation shows that you're attentive and interested.
What do men love to talk about?
What men like to talk about varies widely and may depend on the individual. If you are hoping to get a guy’s attention, it may be a good idea to focus on what you have noticed that he enjoys or simply start a fun conversation. If he likes sports, you may ask about his favorite sport, if he likes food you may ask about his favorite cuisine or favorite food. It is also may be ok to dig deeper and discuss things such as future plans or aspirations or what he values in life. It may be important to read his emotions and body language and not push too much, especially early on.
What kind of questions to ask a guy?
When asking questions to a guy, it's important to choose topics that resonate with his interests and encourage meaningful conversation. Here are some types of questions you can consider:
- Personal Interests: Ask about his hobbies, passions, hidden talents, and favorite activities in his daily life. For example, "What do you enjoy doing in your free time?" or "What's your favorite way to unwind?"
- Future Plans: Inquire about his aspirations and goals, like "Where do you see yourself in the next few years?" or "What's something you've always wanted to achieve?"
- Travel: Ask about his travel experiences and dream destinations, such as "What's the most memorable place you've visited?" or "If you could travel anywhere, where would you go?"
- Books, Movies, and Music: Discuss his favorite books, movies, and music genres. For instance, "What's the last book you read?" or "Do you have a favorite type of music?"
- Opinions: Pose open-ended questions about his thoughts on various topics, like "What's your take on [current event]?" or "How do you feel about [specific subject]?"
- Food and Cooking: Inquire about his culinary preferences or cooking skills, such as "What's your go-to comfort food?" or "Do you enjoy cooking?"
- Life Experiences: Encourage storytelling by asking about his most memorable experiences or adventures, like "Tell me about a time you took a spontaneous trip" or "What's the most exciting thing you've done?"
- Work and Career: Discuss his job and professional interests with questions like "What do you enjoy most about your job?" or "If you could have any career, what would it be?"
- Family and Relationships: Ask about his family, close friends, or experiences related to relationships, like "What's your favorite family tradition?" or "What qualities do you value in a friend?" It may be important to determine his current relationship status before delving into his love life.
- Favorites: Inquire about his favorite things, from colors and seasons to types of food or movies. For example, "What's your favorite way to spend a weekend?" or "Do you have a favorite childhood memory?"
What do you talk about with a guy online?
If you are looking for things to talk about a guy online, you may find this article helpful. Many girls and guys love to talk about passions and hobbies, as well as any shared interests or life experiences. When chatting online you can talk about many of the same things that you would chat about in person, including:
- Sports
- Hobbies
- Goals and aspirations
- Movies and TV
- Current events
- Music
- Pets
- Family
How can I be interesting to a guy?
Being interesting to a guy involves showcasing your authentic self, engaging in meaningful conversations, and sharing your passions. Here's how to capture his attention:
- Be Confident: Confidence is attractive. Embrace your strengths and quirks, and show that you're comfortable in your own skin.
- Engage in Conversations: Participate actively in conversations by asking thoughtful questions, sharing your thoughts, and showing genuine interest in his responses.
- Share Your Passions: Talk about what excites you. Enthusiasm is infectious and can make you captivating to be around.
- Tell Stories: Share intriguing stories from your life, experiences, and adventures. Captivating narratives can spark engaging discussions.
- Be a Good Listener: Pay attention to what he says and show that you value his thoughts. Respond with empathy and ask follow-up questions.
- Stay Informed: Stay updated on current events, pop culture, and topics of interest. This allows you to contribute to a wide range of conversations.
- Pursue Your Interests: Invest time in activities you're passionate about. When you're enthusiastic about your hobbies, it's naturally attractive.
- Be Open-Minded: Approach conversations with an open mind. Discussing diverse topics can create interesting and enlightening exchanges.
- Use Humor: A good sense of humor can be charming. Share light-hearted jokes or anecdotes to keep the atmosphere fun.
- Show Empathy: Express empathy and understanding when he talks about his experiences or challenges. Empathy creates emotional connections.
- Be Curious: Ask questions about his interests, experiences, and viewpoints. Curiosity demonstrates your interest in getting to know him better.
- Stay Positive: Maintain a positive outlook on life. Optimism can make you an enjoyable and uplifting presence.
Remember, being interesting doesn't mean trying to be someone you're not. Authenticity is key to forming genuine connections. The more you showcase your unique qualities and actively engage in conversations, the more likely you are to capture his interest.
How can I make my conversation longer?
Extending a conversation and avoiding the dreaded awkward silence is a skill that takes practice. In some cases, making small talk may help and may allow you to persue conversations that you wouldn’t normally have. Another strategy for continuing a conversation is to practice listening and asking follow-up questions.
You can also extend a conversation by adding in personal stories from your life that may be related to what you are talking about. Even if you feel like your stories are boring, he may find them interesting and add on with his own stories.
How do I stop small talk with a guy?
Although we often want more conversations with someone that we are getting to know, it is always possible that you need to end a conversation or small talk quickly. Some strategies for stopping a conversation include recapping the conversation and letting them know that you enjoyed chatting, introducing them to another friend if at a party, or just saying, “It has been really nice getting to know you, have a great night.”
If you want to end small talk and move on to deeper conversations you may start by asking more open ended questions. You also may ask for advice or insights, or share personal stories. All of these signify that you would like to move past the basics and really get to know the person on a deeper level.
What questions to ask a guy over text?
While it is possible to ask any number of questions via text, it can be challenging to have a deep conversation over text alone. Making small talk over text is much easier, asking things like, “What is your favorite food?” or “What was the last book you read?” are simple answers that don’t require much in the way of forming a conversation.
This is not the case with longer, open ended questions like, “Tell me more about your religious beliefs,” or “Tell me about a moment in your life that made you feel truly alive and happy.” Both of these questions need room for body language, follow-up questions, and personal interaction. This is perhaps best achieved in a face-to-face conversation.
What to ask a guy to know more about him more?
When you want to get to know a guy better, asking thoughtful questions can help you understand his personality, values, and experiences on a deeper level. Here are some questions to consider:
- "What are your hobbies and passions?" Learning about his interests can give you insights into what he enjoys and values in his free time.
- "Tell me about your favorite childhood memories." This question can reveal a lot about his upbringing and experiences that have shaped him.
- "What's something you're most proud of accomplishing?" Asking about achievements can show you what he values and the goals he's set for himself.
- "If you could have any job in the world, what would it be?" This question gives you a glimpse into his aspirations and dreams.
- "What's your idea of a perfect day?" Discovering what he finds enjoyable and meaningful can help you understand his lifestyle and preferences.
- "What's the most important lesson life has taught you so far?" This question delves into his personal growth and the wisdom he's gained from his experiences.
- "What's a book, movie, or song that has had a significant impact on you?" Learning about media that has influenced him can offer insights into his values and emotions.
- "What's your favorite way to unwind and relax?" This question can provide insight into his self-care practices and how he manages stress.
- "If you could travel anywhere, where would you go and why?" Discussing travel can lead to conversations about his sense of adventure and the places he finds intriguing.
- "What qualities do you value most in a friend or partner?" Asking about the qualities he admires can give you an idea of what he looks for in relationships.
How to start a convo?
Starting a conversation effectively involves capturing the person's interest and creating a comfortable atmosphere. Begin with a friendly greeting that sets a positive tone, and consider mentioning a shared experience, common interest, or recent event to establish a connection. For instance, "Hey [Name], I hope you're having a great day! I couldn't help but notice that we both love hiking. Have you been on any exciting trails recently?"
After the initial connection, transition smoothly into an open-ended question that encourages them to share more about themselves. This can be about their experiences, opinions, or preferences. For example, "I'm planning a hiking trip next month. Do you have any favorite hiking spots you'd recommend?" This approach combines a warm greeting, a shared interest, and an engaging question, creating an inviting starting point for a conversation.
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