What Does It Mean, “If You Love Something, Let It Go”? | Exploring the True Meaning of “If You Love Something Let It Go”

By: Mason Komay

Updated March 19, 2021

Medically Reviewed By: Laura Angers

Frequently Asked Questions (FAQs)

  • Is it true if you love something, let it go?

  • What does it mean to love someone enough to let them go?

Bach had the right idea about loving someone enough to let them go. It sounds counterintuitive, but to love someone enough to let them go means that you respect their autonomy and their decision to walk away from the relationship. Maybe, they're trying to find themselves and can't be in a committed partnership right now. It might not be about you at all. The expression, "if you love someone let it go" sometimes talks about mutual love, and other times, it relates to your feelings about an individual.

It’s also about respect. Mutual love is connected with being with a person that you love, and they also love you. When you search for expressions about love, you may find a category list of quotes online. You can find a mantra that resonates with you if you're trying to move through a breakup. True love is real, and it's present when people are committed to one another and understand each other. 

  • Is it true? Why "if you love something let it go"?

You've probably heard if you love something set it free, but why would that be true? If you love someone, it can be easy to want to hold on too tight. This can lead you to be clingy and controlling in your relationship. It can also cause you to force a relationship to continue even if it might be best for it not to. If you are holding on so tight to a relationship, you may be the only one that's trying. Or, you may be actually pushing the other person away. But when you give them the freedom to choose, it can help you to discover the truth of where they stand. If they come back to you, then you know they are doing it out of their own desire and not because you're forcing it to happen. This will most likely help you to have a healthier relationship.

If you're unsure of how to let a person go or if you're holding on to tight, find a therapist that you can talk to. They may be able to help you see things from a new perspective.

  • How do you love and let go?

It's challenging to let go of someone that you care about deeply, but you can't have control over the future or someone else's feelings. You can care about them genuinely, but acknowledge that you can't do anything about how they feel. Acknowledge your feelings and give them the space to explore theirs. You can't make someone feel a certain way or make decisions for them.

  • When you let someone go, do they come back?

There's no way to know for sure if a person will or will not come back to you. Whether or not you're willing to let them go, they do have the autonomy to go, so allow them the space to explore their feelings and let it happen. If they do come back, you'll be surprised possibly, and happy. Not only that, but if you let someone go, this person will know that coming back is their choice, and there won't be old wounds about you trying to pull them in a direction they don't want to go in.

  • Will the love of your life come back?

Unfortunately, there's no guarantee that if you follow the "if you love something set it free" advice that they will come back to you. However, if they don't, it shows you that they may not have felt exactly the same way about you.  This can be difficult to experience but it can also open doors that lead to personal growth.  It may help you to see areas in your life that you want to address and change. If you need someone to talk to as you work through this situation, find a therapist that can work with you.

If your relationship was meant to be, and the other person feels the same way, then they will most likely come back.

  • How do you say goodbye to someone you love forever?

If you find yourself in the place of letting someone go that you love, it's normal to struggle. You may feel a wide range of emotions and experience grief. Following the "love something set it free" advice doesn't always lead to the results that you may hope for.

If you're struggling to find ways to cope through this time, find a therapist that can work with you. This can be a good time to focus on personal growth in your life. Or, it may be helpful to try new hobbies and do things that can shift your mind away from the person that you lost and help you to move forward in a healthy way.

  • Can true love survive a breakup?

Before you decide to love something set it free, you may be wondering if there really is a chance that the relationship could continue in the future. It is possible but it's not a guarantee. Some people find that creating space during a breakup can help them to see what they really had in the other person and what things they were taking for granted. It can also help people to see what changes need to happen for the relationship to be healthier.

If your relationship survives through a breakup, it may be helpful to find a therapist to work with for couples counseling. This can help you to restart the relationship on good terms so you don't follow the old negative patterns that may have existed. Breakups can be tests; therapy can help you learn how to pass them in a healthy way.

  • Can lost feelings come back?

It's no guarantee, but it is possible for lost feelings to return. It can be easy for people to start to take the other person for granted and not focus on the good things they already have in their relationship. When you let them go and don't have them in your life anymore, you may both realize what you've lost. You may rediscover the old feelings that you used to have.

If you're struggling through a breakup, you may want to find a therapist that can help you process your feelings in a healthy way.

  • Can you love someone and let them go?

Yes, you can love someone and let them go. Love isn't always healthy, even when it's genuine, and sometimes, letting go of someone that you love is the best thing to do.

If you know it's best for the relationship to be over but are still struggling, find a therapist that can help you process your feelings and create a plan to move forward.

  • Why is it so hard to let go of someone you love?

“If you love something, set it free” may sound like great advice and has played a role in some of the popular romantic comedies. However, in real life situations, it's not always easy to do. The feelings that you have for someone when you're in love are generally strong. The person is most likely an important part of your life. Choosing to let them go without a guarantee that they'll come back is risky.

However, there are times when this is the best way to move forward in a healthy way. If they come back to you, then the relationship may be better than ever. And if they don't, it can be a good sign that they weren't the right person for you in the first place.

  • How do you say goodbye to someone you don't want to leave?

Saying good-bye isn't always easy, especially when you don't want to leave. If you're going to be saying good-bye, it can be helpful to spend time preparing yourself mentally and emotionally for the change that's going to happen. You may benefit to find a therapist to talk to. They can help you learn strategies that you can use to cope throughout the process. The last thing that you want to happen is to begin struggling with a secondary challenge during this time like anxiety, depression, or eating disorders. Getting help with moving forward in a healthy way may be necessary.

  • Will true love find its way back?

True love will find its way back to you because you care about that person deeply, and they reciprocate. It can be hard to let someone go, but if it is true love, you will find a way to rekindle and reconnect with someone. The most healthy thing that you can do to set that up as a possibility is to let it go unless it comes back naturally. Take that time to discover new things outside of the relationship.

  • When should you let go of a relationship?

If someone breaks up with you or you break up with them, you should let go. Let time pass and use it to learn more about yourself. If the relationship isn't healthy and it isn't positively adding to your life, it's certainly time to let go.

If you're struggling to let go and move on, find a therapist that can help you learn effective and healthy ways to cope.

  • How do you know if you're truly in love with someone?

Love is kind and patient, and if you're truly in love with someone, they add value to your life, and you add something to theirs. It's important to know that you can be in love with someone and that loving them doesn't mean the connection is healthy. You need to look at your relationship objectively and ask yourself, "Is this healthy for me?" if not, it's time to move on.

  • Is true love painful?

True love can be painful if it's not a healthy connection. If you feel like you're in a toxic dynamic, it may be true love, but that doesn't mean you should stay in that dynamic. Be honest with yourself, and let yourself let go of connections that aren't good for you. There is love out there that'll be kind and healthy for you, so it's essential to have that self-awareness and release what's unhealthy so that a better fit can come along in the future.

  • How do you let her go when you still love her?

You can love someone passionately and still let go of them. She needs to take the time to evaluate her feelings, so as hard as it is to let go, let her explore how she feels. She might come back to you, and you might not. While it may take some time, you can get to a place in life where you know that you're okay with or without her. To let go of someone that you still love, let yourself feel your feelings. Cry if you need to, and don't be afraid to reach out to loved ones or speak with a licensed mental health professional.

  • Does letting go mean giving up?

Letting go doesn't mean giving up on love itself, on your life, or your happiness. You're giving up on trying to control what you can't, which is a powerful and healthy thing to do.

  • How do I stop loving someone?

There's no quick answer to this question. Even if you feel that this is true love, you can still let go of the person. You might love this person for the rest of your life, but you need to understand that just because you love them, it doesn't mean that you need to be with them. You can care deeply about this individual and appreciate their qualities or what they bring to your life, and you don't need to pressure yourself to stop loving them. You can also talk to a therapist about these concerns and work through the feelings you're experiencing.

  • How do you get over someone you love deeply?

The wounds can be deep, but allow yourself to heal. You might need to stop contact with them, and that's partially what "if you love someone, let them go" means. You may need to take a step back and not speak to the person even if you love them so that you can truly let it go.

  • Can someone leave you if they love you?

Someone can leave you if they love you. If they don't feel like it's serving them in their life, they don't need to stay, and the same is true for you. It's not necessarily about loving someone, but about if someone is adding happiness and joy to your life experience. Love is complicated, but you need to pick apart if you want to be with them and if it's healthy.

  • How do you know if someone will come back to you?

Unfortunately, we don't have a crystal ball that can tell us the future. You can use your intuition, which is different from knowing what'll happen in the future. If you intuitively feel that this person will come back in the future, that could be true, but it's essential to trust the universe and know that even though you can't control things, letting go will help you and your mental health. You can't know that they'll come back, but focusing on the moment and doing things in your life that bring you joy will help you through the process. That might mean taking art classes, theater classes, or playing a sport that you're passionate about. Put that energy into something that you can control rather than something that you can't.

  • How do you get your ex back when he has moved on?

Your ex has to decide if they want to be with you or not. You can be receptive if they're going to talk to you and are willing to have a conversation about reentering each other's lives, but don't try to force them to come back. Breaking up can be frustrating because you want them to be in your life, but trying to "get someone back" can be incredibly destructive. Let them have their own experience, and if you're meant to be together, they'll come back, because true love that is healthy and meant to be will thrive.

  • Should you fight for the one you love?

If you believe that it is true love, there's nothing inherently wrong about fighting for it, depending on what that means to you. The most important thing to note is that there's only so much you can do. One healthy way of fighting for someone you love is to express your feelings, let it be known that you care for them, and know that what they do with what you're telling them is up to them. You may believe that this is your true love, but there's only one way to know, and that's to let them process how they feel in response to your emotions. If it's true love, you'll both agree that you want to be together. It's unfair to be in a relationship where the other person doesn't reciprocate, so make sure that the kind of relationship you seek out is reciprocal. It's okay to fight for someone, but you have to let them make the decision.

  • Why let go of someone you love?

Letting someone you love go is crucial sometimes. If they make a conscious decision to come back, you'll know that it is true love. You deserve to be with someone who loves you as much as you love them. It is a powerful move to have the confidence to let go. Know that no matter what the outcome is, you are whole, and you will be okay. You will survive this experience, and if you need to speak to a therapist to guide you through the process, there's nothing wrong with that. The counselors at BetterHelp are here to lean on for support.

  • What do you do if you love someone?

The best thing you can do when you love someone is to let them know how you feel. It's powerful to express your emotions in a vulnerable way no matter what the response is because that way, everything is out on the table. Whether you're together or not will have to be a mutual decision, but you have ownership over your feelings, and they have ownership over theirs. If you love someone, express it and see what comes next.

Therapy Is Personal

Therapy is a personal experience, and not everyone will go into it seeking the same things. But, keeping these nine things in mind can ensure that you will get the most out of online therapy, regardless of what your specific goals are.

If you’re still wondering if therapy is right for you, and how much therapy costs, please contact us at contact@betterhelp.com. BetterHelp specializes in online therapy to help address all types of mental health concerns. If you’re interested in individual therapy, please reach out to contact@betterhelp.com. For more information about BetterHelp as a company, please find us on 
If you need a crisis hotline or want to learn more about therapy, please see below:
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Further Reading

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