BetterHelp Helped Me Feel Alive Again: Amanda’s Mental Health Journey
For the over 41.7 million US adults in therapy, finding a counselor who makes a difference can be one of the most essential aspects of mental healthcare. With a broad client base turning to online therapists, clients like Amanda tell their stories of meeting with a therapist who made a difference. Reading these accounts can help you decide whether online therapy is the right choice for you.
Below, you can read about Amanda’s experiences with online therapy through BetterHelp. You’ll also find some strategies you can use to support your well-being during challenging moments, as well as information on different therapeutic approaches that may help improve your mental health.
BetterHelp helped me feel alive again: Amanda’s therapy experience
The following is an honest review written by an actual BetterHelp patient named Amanda:
"I went without treatment for multiple mental health-related issues for a long time.
There aren't many resources available where I live that I have been happy with. My previous counselor forgot who I was from appointment to appointment, and she would take personal calls during our appointments to discuss furniture and groceries with her family. Meanwhile, my transit commute was approximately an hour to see her.
However, because that's all my insurance could provide me with in my financial situation, I continued going despite feeling extremely dissatisfied. Eventually, I stopped seeing that counselor and worked through some volatile withdrawal symptoms without professional therapeutic help.
Many providers on BetterHelp now accept major insurance carriers. In many states, certain therapists on BetterHelp may be in-network with certain insurance plans. Coverage depends on your plan, provider, and availability.
When sessions are covered, members typically pay an average copay of about $19 per session. Check your in-network status on the BetterHelp site. Coverage varies by state and provider availability.
My doctor prescribed me multiple medications, which only worsened my condition. I went on with my life, still very depressed, insecure, and hating myself and everything and everyone in my proximity. I wouldn't eat because I was too sad, and I lost a lot of weight over the course of a year. My relationship fell apart, and the heartbreak of losing the person I loved the most was overwhelming. My job was depressing and slow, with lots of idle time to wallow in misery.
Starting with BetterHelp
I hit rock bottom and started writing goodbye letters to my friends and family. I thought about it so much that I had become resigned to it. Every day, I wanted it to be over; the pain never stopped. I would have crying breakdowns at work and then come home and collapse on the floor in front of the fridge, too exhausted and sad to eat food. This process was regular for me for over a year.
Then one day, I woke up to find out my cousin had committed suicide. It broke my heart, and I felt such an impact even though we weren't close. Yet, it felt like it was too close to me. It shook me; it was such a sad ending. So, the following day, I decided to seek proper help.
An hour-long appointment with a counselor or therapist where I live can cost anywhere from $70 to over $200, and I couldn't afford that, nor did I wish to return to my previous doctor.
In-Person Therapy
$100–$350 / session
- ✓ Licensed therapists
- ✗ Limited to office hours
- ✗ Commute required
BetterHelp
$70–$100 / week *
- ✓ Licensed therapists
- ✓ Messaging your therapist any time
- ✓ Live chat, phone, or video sessions
- ✓ Journaling
- ✓ Group Sessions & Classes
- ✓ Smart provider matching
- ✓ Switch therapists anytime
- ✓ Access from anywhere online
Talkspace
$99+ / week
- ✓ Qualified therapists
- ✓ Messaging included
- ✓ Video sessions (limited)
Then I remembered seeing ads on Instagram and Facebook for online counseling through BetterHelp. They had been popping up in my feed for the last year or two. It intrigued me, so I investigated it, and the rates were refreshing! For the cost of one appointment, I got a whole month. Another feature I loved was that I could choose my counselor and switch them anytime if I wasn't satisfied. This option is excellent for people with my kind of disposition.
If I don't get on well with my provider or feel comfortable, I will not open up, so selecting my therapist gave me control over the situation. The final thing that won me over was that all sessions were via live chat or video calls. I didn't have to commute an hour to get to my appointment. Instead, I could write what I was feeling or experiencing any time.
I chose Beth Ellen Hancock, who had a lot of experience with the specific issues I was facing: low self-worth, anorexia, depression, high anxiety, obsessive thoughts, poor impulse control, and so on. She responded very quickly, and we began our work together. I appreciated her investment in my situation; it was exactly what I needed. She provided me with multiple tools and distraction techniques that allowed me to overcome my obsessive thoughts. My favorite thing is counting by sevens to distract myself from obsessing. It works for me because it's complicated enough to require all my attention. It honestly didn't take long to see improvement in my moods. I have been with Beth for almost a month, and now I'm eating correctly and putting more effort into caring for myself.
Therapy can make a difference
I am totally in love with BetterHelp! I needed therapy, not medication, and so many other people are in the same situation. Medication sometimes covers up an issue without resolving it. Sometimes, we need someone outside our minds and patterns to help us form better reactions. This interactive therapy has allowed me to control my situations instead of letting them control me. Seeing a therapist is probably my most significant accomplishment because I feel in control. Before I started this therapy, I felt grey, colorless, and dying inside. Now I feel hopeful, happy, content, and calm. I highly recommend this service to anyone who needs thorough help figuring out themselves and their challenges.
It made me want to be alive again."
Finding the right therapist isn’t just important – it’s everything.
Find your matchThe first step out of rock bottom
Feelings of grief and shame can often accompany depressive episodes and may make it difficult to view yourself and the world around you in a positive light. This can, in turn, make it hard to summon motivation to do things like get out of bed, go to work, or socialize. However, regular self-care can help support your recovery and may even help alleviate symptoms. For instance, a recent study of over 5,000 people with depression found that exercise was as effective in reducing symptoms as certain antidepressant medications.
Other self-care strategies that may help you if you’ve hit a low period include:
- Eating a healthy and nutritious diet (which has been shown to improve symptoms of depression)
- Improving your sleep hygiene (which is associated with improvements in various mental health symptoms)
- Reminding yourself of what you’re grateful for, whether via a journal, meditation, an app, or another practice (which has been shown to improve mood and reduce depressive symptoms)
- Tidying up your living space (which has been shown to reduce stress and anxiety, boost mood, and improve overall mental health)
Beyond self-help: Therapy for recovery
The above strategies can be useful for supporting your mental health as you’re beginning your recovery journey. However, they’re typically not a substitute for professional treatment and may work best as a supplement to therapy.
As Amanda’s story shows, working with the right therapist can often be the first step toward rediscovering hope and reclaiming your sense of happiness. Various types of therapy may help improve symptoms of mental illness and support overall mental health. Some examples include:
- Cognitive therapy, which focuses on identifying and changing thoughts and beliefs that are causing you distress
- Cognitive-behavioral therapy (CBT), which combines elements of cognitive therapy with behavioral techniques to improve symptoms
- Interpersonal psychotherapy (IPT), which focuses on addressing relationship challenges that might be contributing to your symptoms
- Psychodynamic therapy, which focuses on understanding how early life experiences and unconscious thoughts might be affecting your thoughts, feelings, and behavior
- Mindfulness-based cognitive therapy (MBCT), which combines elements of cognitive therapy with mindfulness practices
The length of time these treatments take can vary; some individuals might start noticing improvements within the first few sessions, while others may start to feel a difference within a few months.
Although Amanda found therapy more helpful than medication in her situation, this experience is not universal. Depending on your situation, your mental healthcare provider may also recommend supplementing therapy with some form of medication—such as a selective serotonin reuptake inhibitor (SSRI), a serotonin-norepinephrine reuptake inhibitor (SNRI), or a mood stabilizer—as part of your treatment plan. Treatment recommendations may vary based on your preferences and the specific symptoms you’re experiencing.
Online counseling options
Thousands of clients like Amanda have started seeking online therapy due to its convenience, cost-effectiveness, and availability. In addition, scientific studies and surveys have found that online therapy is effective in treating the symptoms of conditions like depression and anxiety.
If you're in a low place or are seeking someone to talk to about any topic, consider signing up with an online platform like BetterHelp, to be matched quickly with a licensed therapist who fits your needs. You don't need a diagnosis to get started, and you can change therapists as often as you like in order to find the right fit. You also have the ability to message your therapist any time via in-app messaging, and they will respond as soon as they can. This may make it easier to find support and motivation between sessions.
Getting started with BetterHelp is simple:
- Take a short questionnaire. Answer a few quick questions about your goals, preferences, and the type of therapist you’d like to work with.
- Get matched quickly. In most cases, you can be matched with a licensed provider in as little as 48 hours.
- Start therapy on your terms. Schedule sessions by video, phone, or live chat, and join from anywhere you have an internet connection.
Finding the right therapist isn’t just important – it’s everything.
Find your matchTakeaway
It can sometimes be challenging to find a therapist you connect with when you’re experiencing mental health struggles. While strategies like self-care may help supplement professional treatment, working with a therapist is often the first step toward healing—and Amanda’s story shows that finding the right fit can often make a big difference in your recovery. If you've been considering therapy but can't find an option in your area, an online therapist may offer a better fit for you. Take the first step today to be matched with a therapist and start your mental health journey.
How do I know if I’ve hit rock bottom?
You might sense that you’re at “rock bottom” if you’ve reached a point of despair, emptiness, or a sense that you can’t go on in the same way. At rock bottom, many people realize that they need to make changes to improve their lives or get relief.
While many people believe you need to hit “rock bottom” to accept that you need help, people with serious mental illnesses can’t always see their situation clearly, and it’s much safer to get help before things spiral to the point of despair.
If you’re experiencing symptoms that cause you or others distress, interfere with your ability to carry out daily functions, or leave you unsatisfied with your life, consider contacting a talk therapist.
Can you recover from rock bottom?
Yes, you can recover from rock bottom. Even if you’ve reached a place of significant distress or crisis, you can get better. There are many free 24/7 crisis helplines available if you need immediate help, including the 988 Suicide and Crisis Lifeline and the Crisis Textline (Text Home to 741741). A therapist can also be a valuable source of longer-term support on your recovery journey.
In addition to working with a licensed therapist and medical practitioner, there are some things you can do on your own to improve your mental health, including:
- Practice self-acceptance: Talk to yourself the way you would a close friend, using gentle, kind, and encouraging language
- Try some self-care strategies: Journaling, meditation, mindfulness, deep breathing exercises, yoga, walking in the park, calling your best friend, drinking some herbal tea, cooking a meal from your childhood, or petting your dog are all self-care strategies that can provide comfort and help you regulate your emotions
- Get involved in your community: Try signing up for a class at your local community center, volunteering for a cause that you care about, or joining a support group
Research shows that around 75% of people who try talk therapy get at least some benefit from it. In combination with medications and self-care strategies, many people experience improvements in symptoms of serious mental disorders.
What should you do if you’re depressed but can’t afford therapy?
If you’re depressed but cannot afford therapy, whether for insurance or location-related reasons, here are some options that might help:
Ask about sliding scales: Some therapists offer flexible payment structures, such as sliding scales, to increase the availability of services based on the client's ability to pay. If the therapist offers a sliding scale model, they may ask for documentation such as tax returns.
Join a support group: There are many online and in-person support groups available. Organizations like the National Alliance on Mental Illness offer various peer-led support groups for people living with mental illness. These groups are available to participants free of charge.
Contact a crisis helpline: Crisis helplines are typically staffed 24/7, providing free support services by trained crisis counseling volunteers. While this option may not be the best for long-term support, helpline staff may be able to connect you with free or low-cost services. The American Psychological Association provides an extensive list of reputable mental health helplines for challenges such as disaster distress, child abuse, sexual assault, veteran support, and suicide prevention. Many of these services have options for non-English speakers and people who are hard of hearing or deaf.
Research your local resources: Your state or county may offer free or low-cost mental health programs and services. Consider searching for community mental health clinics in your area for affordable support.
Work with a psychiatrist: Psychiatrists are medical doctors who specialize in mental health. They can prescribe psychiatric medications, and many of them offer psychotherapy as part of their treatment plans.
Try online therapy: Research shows that online talk therapy can be as effective as in-person therapy. Platforms like BetterHelp offer online therapy that is typically more affordable than in-person care. In addition, many BetterHelp therapists are now accepting certain insurance carriers, and financial aid is available to qualifying users.
Try some self-care strategies: Meditation, mindfulness, journaling, calling a loved one, walking in a park, yoga, tai chi, deep breathing, playing music, and exercise can improve your mood and help you cope with stressors.
Practice radical self-acceptance: Radical self-acceptance means accepting yourself, flaws and all, for who you are and your experience in the world. This practice can help you accept the things in life that you cannot change.
What are the pros and cons of online therapy?
The pros of online therapy often include flexibility, ease of scheduling, lower cost, and convenience; however, online therapy might not be the best option for people navigating a serious mental health crisis. It may also not work well for people who lack a stable internet connection.
I’ve tried therapy before and it did not work. Should I try it again?
Yes, if you’ve tried one type of therapy and didn’t find it beneficial, you may want to consider trying a different type or working with a different therapist.
There are many different types of psychotherapy (talk therapy). Some types, like cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT), are short-term and goal-oriented. Other types of therapy, like psychodynamic therapy, can be more exploratory and help you investigate your past.
Therapists have different levels of education, experiences, and approaches to therapy, and it can take some trial and error to find the right therapist for you.
Some people find it helpful to work with a therapist who has a similar spiritual/religious background, cultural background, gender identity, or sexual orientation. Platforms like BetterHelp use questionnaires to match you with a therapist who sounds like a good fit, asking questions like “Do you prefer to be matched with a therapist who is part of the LGBTQ+ community?”
Are there signs that mean it is time to start therapy?
While no two people are exactly alike, it may be time to start therapy if you experience the following:
Trauma: It’s a good idea to work with a therapist if you’ve experienced traumatic events, such as living through a natural disaster, abuse, neglect, a diagnosis of a serious or chronic illness, a traumatic birth, or an accident. Working with a therapist after experiencing a traumatic event can reduce your risk of developing a disorder like post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD).
Chronic stress: Irritability, feelings of overwhelm, digestive issues, muscle tension, difficulty concentrating, and changes in appetite can all be signs of chronic stress. Often, people use maladaptive coping strategies, such as substance use, rumination, avoidance, self-harm, or emotional numbing, to deal with stress. In the long term, these strategies can lead to worsening mental and physical health, but a therapist can teach you healthier coping tools and stress reduction techniques.
Sleep or eating changes: Sleeping more than usual or having trouble falling and staying asleep can be signs of distress. Similarly, significant changes in appetite, eating habits, or weight can signify emotional distress. In some cases, these symptoms can be indicative of an underlying mental health disorder.
Interpersonal challenges: If you’re navigating issues in your relationships with friends, family, romantic partners, co-workers, or others, it may be time to work with a therapist. They can help you work on communication skills, such as conflict resolution, active listening, boundary setting, and using “I” language.
Other signs: Hopelessness, irritability, difficulty regulating intense emotions, sadness, languishing, obsessive thoughts, low self-esteem, difficulty concentrating, and negative self-talk are all signs that you might benefit from talking with a therapist.
Even if you have no specific concerns, talk therapy can be a preventative mental health tool. By establishing a relationship with a therapist now, you’ll have someone who can help with early symptom detection, and they’ll be available to help you navigate stressors—like changing jobs, moving, getting married, or having children.
How do I make myself feel alive again?
If you’re recovering from depression, anxiety, or another mental illness, you may be able to make yourself feel alive again by:
- Working with a licensed therapist
- Getting regular exercise
- Eating a healthy, nutritious diet
- Practicing good sleep hygiene
- Engaging in meaningful hobbies—even if you don’t initially feel like it
- Spending time around friends or loved ones
- Decluttering your living space
Why have I lost motivation for life?
If you feel like you’ve lost motivation in life, you might be experiencing depression or a related mood disorder. These mental illnesses often cause symptoms like a lack of motivation, reduced pleasure in activities that were once enjoyable, and low energy. If your feelings are causing you distress, you may want to connect with a mental health professional or utilize the resources on our Get Help Now page.
How do I know if my therapist is the right fit?
Some signs you’ve found the right therapist for you may include:
- You feel comfortable being open and vulnerable with your therapist
- Your therapist makes you feel heard, respected, and understood
- You enjoy talking to your therapist and look forward to your sessions
- You can collaborate with your therapist to set goals and make a plan to achieve them
- Your therapist pays attention to you and absorbs what you tell them
- You sense a positive change in your mental health as you’re working with your therapist, even if it’s gradual
Can I change therapists if I am not matched well at first?
With BetterHelp, you can change therapists at any time, for any reason. You can do this as often as you like until you find the right therapist for you.
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