How do I get over the anger I have to someone who used to treat mẹ badly?

I used to be mentally abused by ạ relative. I stayed with them for 2 months and was treated horribly. Even though I cut contact with them and moved on with my life, I still sometimes think about what happened to me back then, and I get really angry. I wish I could shout in their face and let them know how much they hurt me back then and how I can never get over the trauma they gave me, but that's not a possible solution.
Asked by Hanna


Thank you for your question. My name is Radka Kozielova. I work for BetterHelp as a therapist, I am very passionate and committed to my role in helping others. If you would like to know more about me please click on my name on this page

Firstly you have done the hardest part by getting away and cutting all contact with this person. You know in your heart the mental abuse was wrong. Nobody deserves that. This person that put you through this is the one with the issues, if you were a child when this happened, report them; make sure nobody else suffers at this person hands.

Now let's think about you, you will never forgive this person or forget the mental torture this person has put you through but you can learn to move on from it. People that abuse others no matter whether it is physical, mental or sexual abuse are weak; they abuse other’s for their own satisfaction. They want to belittle others to feel strong themselves. Write down exactly how this person has made you feel don’t hold back, put pen to paper and release all those feelings you have kept inside for so long. Decide then if you want to send that letter to that person or if you want to put it in a drawer and anytime you feel angry add to it.

Just remember you are a good person. You did not deserve any of this mental abuse and you are far better than the abuser. Always remember you are better and stronger than they will ever be. You have recognized that this was abuse and you have got away from them. Look around you. Look at all you have achieved in life and embrace how that makes you feel, hang on to those good positive energies, release the anger you hold for the person that mentally abused you. Do not stay trapped in what they have said. Like I said earlier: embrace all the good in your life and keep moving forward.

If you feel I could help you on this journey to find self love, please don’t hesitate to contact me.