How do you control your anger and not let your anger control you?
Thank you for reaching out for help to understand the feelings of anger that you are experiencing.
I am sorry that you are going through these feelings.
It's important to see that there is help that can make a difference. Learning how to control emotions will help you control and express your feelings, which can also include sadness, fear and disappointment. The way you describe your anger it sounds like this way of expressing your feelings could come after a build up of emotions. Exploring the reasons behind why you are unable to discuss these in a calm way will help you to break the behaviour of getting angry
Anger allows for all emotions to be expressed, even if the feelings being experienced include other emotions. (as listed above)The risk is that to the other people involved, they only see the anger and nothing else and this can bring feelings of not really being heard
Becoming angry, although helps to say how you feel, it is a very stressful way of coping with your feelings and is likely to have an effect on your mental health as It can take so much out of you. The recovery time after an outburst can have a negative impact, such as, leading to feelings of guilt, anxiety as well as feelings of being understood, which can lead to depression.
Learning new ways of coping with your emotions will help you to feel present with your feelings and will encourage validation that your feelings are important and necessary to be heard.
Alongside therapy, writing a journal is a good way of releasing your feelings and it helps you to become in tune with what emotion you are feeling at the time.
Writing provides your future self with the coping strategies that you have learned work and you show you that there is often a different way of approaching things that are more positive for you.
Talking through your experiences with a counsellor will give you the support for you explore your memories of your life's experiences, to help you to gain a deeper understanding of yourself. This will help you to identify the triggers that cause the anger and allow you to learn new ways of coping with your emotions in a more positive and calm way.