How do I overcome the fear of meeting new people, making friends and being able to keep them.

There are two parts to this issue, how do you go out and meet new people for a start. I would suggest you begin with small steps. What are the thoughts that arise for you when you think about going out to meet new people and are they realistic, it may help to write down what comes to mind, then look at these ideas objectively, as if you were a close friend of the person that has these thoughts and how you would help them to proceed. 

Start from where you feel comfortable and push the boundary just a little, for example - is going outside your front door a challenge? Stand in the doorway face the fear of that to begin with, set an achievable goal. Are there ways to make this easier for you, is there someone that could facilitate this, is it easier at certain times of the day or under particular circumstances. It is important to feel safe in challenging yourself.

Having self compassion is important when facing challenges of this kind, it can take a long time to overcome difficulties and reach goals that may seem small to others but a big step to us. The fact that you have sought help in making a change is the first step in your journey to reaching your potential. The version of you that you want, already exists, if you can give her space she will grow.  

The second part is - what is behind this? Can you think of when this started and what the feelings are? Is the issue going out altogether or about meeting people? It may be there was a life event that triggered this or many changes or difficulties over a period of time. Bringing awareness to what is happening can be this first steps in understanding the reasons for the difficulties we have and understanding can facilitate recovery. Self understanding and self compassion can lead to a sustainable way of managing difficult feelings long term. With self compassion we can see that life can be challenging and offer ourselves kindness and not comparison to a perception of other peoples success. I would love the opportunity to help you explore this further. 

June