What to do when a friendship ends?

What are friendships?

Connections are very important to us as human beings and are needed to live a healthy life.  We start developing these relationships with family members first. Then when our circles start to expand with daycare, school, religious congregations, we start to form relationships outside of our families.  These relationships are very important and help us with our social and emotional development.  Learning to share and be empathetic is part of friendships and trusting others, and sharing positive experiences. As we grow older friendships, become even more important in the teen and young adult years.  Some people have had friends since they were born, and others do not presently have those relationships. 

Types of friendships

Friendships can be broken down into four categories.  There are acquaintances that you know and maybe follow on social media but do not necessarily hang out with or talk to very often.  You are cordial to them when you see them, but it is more of a surface relationship.  Then there are friends; these relationships are a little deeper than acquaintances but still are more surface.  Next, there are close friends.  These are people you talk to more and trust to share things that are personal about yourself.  The closest form of a friend is what we call a best friend.  These are deep relationships built on trust and understanding.  They love you for who you are and accept you wholeheartedly. 

What to do when a friendship ends

Just like many types of relationships, friendships can end. Most of the time, it is not mutually decided about or even maybe talked about like a breakup among partners.  Sometimes people grow apart with neither party to blame and the two-stop talking.  They could move to more of an acquaintance instead of a friend or close friend.  It can be hurtful if one party still desires friendship.  There are times that arguments happen which end a friendship where neither party wants to forgive the other person, or the trust is broken.  It is important to remember that it should not be taken personally regardless of the friendship ending.  Everyone has different personalities and needs that they desire in a friendship, and sometimes they are not met in the current relationship, or people change and have different needs.  If it is fitting, you can talk to the other person about it and try to obtain closure from the conversation.  It may be hurtful but try not to stop you from putting yourself out there and making other friends or reconnect with old friends you may not have talked to in a while. Dr. Suess has a quote that I think is very powerful when it comes to any relationship, “Be who you are and say what you feel because those who mind don’t matter and those who matter don’t mind.”