What are some tools that could help me?

I feel like I get jealous a lot, specifically with women when I’m in a romantic relationship. Sometimes when I’m trying to be conscious I try to stop myself. And other times I failed and it causes an argument.
Asked by Z

Hi Z,

There are some things that you could do to help you. Just know that jealousy is a normal human emotion but it's learning your triggers and what you tend to do when you are jealous that is important. At some point in time in our life we will most likely be jealous here or there, it is when we feel like it is a problem or if it is constant that we have to start trying different things. 

One of the most important things to do is to take some time for self-exploration and digging deep into you to try and understand why you are jealous. Learning self-awareness and trying to identify your insecurities and talking them out is important in this case. We all have our own insecurities that we need to work on and that is ok. There is usually some underlying reason behind these kinds of feelings. When we are digging deep and exploring ourselves it can feel uncomfortable but it is necessary. If we do not know the why then we will have a hard time identifying our triggers and if we can not identify our triggers then we do not really know how we can cope with it. So this would be your very first step in this process that you are going through. 

When you are in a relationship and you feel jealous feelings it is very important to communicate this with your partner. Have an open conversation with them and they can give you insight and help guide you. If you keep it inside it can build up and cause you to get upset with your partner and them having no clue why. Keeping open communicate would be extremely important. 

Also learning different coping skills to help deal with your jealous feelings could overall be helpful. You know you are a jealous person which is good that you are aware of that but trying to find the why, the triggers and then different skills to help you get through the feeling will overall be beneficial for you. 

When we let these feelings get in the way it can cause a negative impact on ourselves, our relationships and the people around us so it's good that you are starting today asking these questions.