What to Do When Therapy Is Going Nowhere?

This is a good question because there can be times in the therapeutic process when it may feel like therapy is going nowhere, and sometimes that's normal, and sometimes it's not. There may be different reasons why you believe that therapy is going nowhere. Let's take a look at what some of those reasons could be.

The most obvious reason would be that therapy is actually going nowhere. There may be a sense or feeling that the therapy session is just a time to get together with a therapist to discuss weekly events. It may feel more like a weekly meeting than an actual productive therapy session. Every now and then there are sessions that are catch-up sessions, which means that you take time to talk to the therapist about casual things that are going on in life at that moment. Those are great times to set the stage for how you are feeling, the important people in your life, and how you spend your days. All of these things are helpful to know so your therapist can help you in the best way possible. However, if most of your sessions are just banter back and forth on weekly happenings in your life, therapy may be going nowhere.

Another valid reason that therapy may not be going anywhere is when there is a personality conflict between the client and the therapist. Therapists are not like a one-size-fits-all garment, they are specialty providers with the personality that shines through. It is essential to find a therapist that clicks with your personality, otherwise, you may start to feel uncomfortable with the therapist and therapy will be going nowhere. One way to decide if the therapist will be a good match is to ask for a 10-minute consultation call before setting up an appointment. Most, not all, therapists will offer this option to ensure that you both will be a good fit for each other and that you will get the best benefit from the therapeutic alliance.

Therapy can also feel like it is going nowhere if you are not putting in the work. Therapy is not a passive activity, it requires work and that may look like doing homework assignments from the therapist, keeping a journal, and being prepared for the session. Therapy works when you work it, take accountability for your therapy sessions by being an active participant, this can help to make sure therapy is going somewhere.