How do you set boundaries and move on from someone you love but won’t acknowledge your feelings?

Good evening, and thank you so much for your time and question.  

I am sorry to hear that your relationship is ending after one and half years, stemming from an argument over him not changing his Facebook status. As you said, you feel this is something minor, and while a relationship ending is hurtful enough, having it end over something that you view as so minor and easy to change can make things even more frustrating and confusing. 

I obviously do not know the entire context of the situation, nor how the relationship was throughout its tenure, but from what you have wrote above, it appears like he may have been reluctant to change his Facebook status for reasons he was unwilling to communicate with you. In regards to how you can set boundaries and move on from somebody you love that won't acknowledge your feelings, there are several strategies that can be helpful for you and your healing journey. 

The first is to write a mock letter to him. I would recommend against giving it to, but it could be helpful to write out how you feel towards him and the relationship ending. After that, ripping or burning the letter can be a cathartic practice to release, or "let go" of those feelings for him, and for the relationship. 

In regards to setting boundaries, I would first encourage you to decide what boundaries you would want to set, then I would encourage you to be willing to double down on those boundaries, and remember that a main purpose of setting those boundaries is to keep us safe and prioritize your feelings, regardless of what response or push back you may get from your ex. When we set boundaries, other people are not accustomed to that, and will push back, believing that the new boundaries you have set are meant to harm, or agitate them. Which is why it can be just as important to double down on that boundary, as it is to set one in the first place. 

If you are to communicate with him, it can also be helpful to do so using "I" statements. This makes your statements less accusatory, and can facilitate a healthier conversation, rather than having the other person feel attacked, and getting on the defensive. I.E. "I felt like you were hiding something when I saw that you had not changed your Facebook status". Those can be some helpful steps to not only set boundaries, but also to move on from a relationship you are looking to move on from.

I hope this information was helpful, and I wish you the best of luck with this situation. Thank you for reaching out!