I don't know where to start.

Hello there AP,

My names is James Pelzer.

I am a mental health counselor, licensed in the state of Florida.

Your question gave me the feeling that you are truly exhausted.  Maybe emotionally more so than physically but yes I can understand being exhausted. 

Where do I start? How do I start?

These are both anticipated questions when contemplating change. The good news....YOU HAVE STARTED!!

Reaching out to BetterHelp was probably not the absolute first thing that you did in your healing process. The acceptance of a need to change along with the identification of which areas you want to adjust are not to be overlooked!

So I am seeing that you are interested in improving your self esteem, becoming less anxious, having more physical energy and overall improving your well being along with an increased sense of happiness. I may have missed something but once you move towards prioritizing which area you want to focus on "first' you may find that most of these are interrelated.

Let's consider the basic process of change. As I said you have to have some level of motivation, which you seem to have.

Then you need to evaluate your day to day routine for habits or sources of distress. Are there specific people, places or things that seem to create the anxiety/sadness within you? If yes, can you avoid them? Example: a certain area of town causes distress because of specific events or circumstances. Avoid going to that area, even if it is inconvenient, or only go with others, not alone. If this helps, repeat.

Keep track of each time that you successfully complete a difficult task and acknowledge the progress. Example- set a goal of no use of profanity ... each day that you don't use profanity tell yourself that it was an accomplishment.  Then add, if I can change that what else can I change. This seems simple but when it comes to self esteem building start with something small.

Without more detailed information about your specific life events I am limited in knowing how to give suggestions.

Keep the momentum going. I hope that you find the right support for your continued progress. Make the next connection whether it be formal face to face therapy, phone contact, online contact, medication evaluation or more research. The immense amount of information available on the internet is amazing. Look for things like "coping with anxiety/depression", "improving self esteem" or " better self care routines."

I hope this helps you find the next segment of your path.

James