I'm feeling hopeless in my job

I'm glad that you decided to come back to therapy. It's important to understand, when we stop doing therapy and don't apply the skills that we have learned previously, that tends to lead us back to that relapse. We lose that consistency and process that has been working for us, and we end up falling apart. We recover, by getting ourselves back into a routine, structure, and back into the lifestyle that has worked for us previously. Coming back to therapy is important, so that you can regain and acquire the skills and techniques that are helpful for preventing relapse and maintaining stability. Therapy is a big part of that, because it provides accountability, structure, support, and the skills that are needed to stay consistent. A lot of times when we stop doing what we're doing that is working for us, we fall into complacency and we can only sit in complacency for so long before we end up relapsing. But relapsing isn't about giving up, because it's something that ends up happening from time to time, even though we want to prevent it. So when we relapse, we want to be able to pick up the pieces and promote our stability again using what works for us.

With the imposter syndrome, it's important to understand the strategies to help manage it, and in terms reduce the syndrome and let go of it so that you're able to continue to work on your current meaning in life. It can definitely be very frustrating and a scary experience. Imposter syndrome is a type of self doubt and it's important to be as kind to yourself as possible when you're experiencing it. You don't want to beat yourself up for feeling that you don't deserve your career. it's really important to focus on awareness. When you feel that the syndrome is creeping in or you're experiencing it, you want to focus on embracing it. Don't try to get rid of it and don't try to judge it, but focus on observing the situation and being aware of what's going on. Acknowledge your thoughts, your feelings, the sensations that you're experiencing, but don't judge them just to identify that they are there. Recognize when your thoughts and self evaluations are driven by the syndrome. Naming it can help you to better understand what is going on. Normalizing it is also important. Recognizing that many people face the syndrome at some point, and it's connected to all different types of people. Most of the skills that come with managing imposter syndrome relate to our self esteem, confidence. We want to get in touch with treating ourselves well as I had mentioned previously, because the big thing is that the syndrome is a type of self doubt and we end up doubting our own skills, abilities, and achievements. So we want to be able to bring out those things that we have been doubting. Which will help you to let go of the fear that you are always performing, acting, and being fake with what you do.

You want to focus on making a list of your strengths. even if you feel this isn't right, or it's fake, there has to be something you appreciate about yourself. So focus on writing a list of those good sides and look at it every time the syndrome is starting to come back. You may even want to add the accomplishments to this list, and things that you're good at. You can ask family and friends for help if you find yourself struggling. Sometimes we need the assistance of the people around us to pull out these strengths and accomplishments so that we can acknowledge them and know that they are part of us.

Working to build yourself esteem will also be important. As the syndrome, as I had mentioned is linked to self doubt. I'm attaching a link to a worksheet that focuses on steps for strengthening your self-esteem. These steps not only will aide in improving your self-esteem, but will also be helpful in managing the syndrome you are experiencing. Building-Self-Esteem-Booklet.pdf (lrjfoundation.com)

Our brains like to focus on what we tell them to focus on. When we are experiencing imposter syndrome, our brains are functioning from an illogical belief system so we end up searching for information to support the imposter syndrome. We want to focus on replacing the thoughts that are dysfunctional with facts, logic, and evidence. Reality based information is the best source for replacing thoughts because they aren't opinion based. A lot of times our thoughts are opinion based and not actually factual, so they aren't evidence proven.

The big thing we also want to focus on is letting go of perfectionism. Perfectionism is the energy source for imposture syndrome. It's the idea of being perfect or doing things perfectly prompts us to experience the irrational and unrealistic standards that contribute to the syndrome and undermine our goals. Sometimes we focus so much energy on being perfect and doing things perfectly that we don't finish our goal, and then we end up feeling bad about it and being hard on ourselves. Focusing on using your strengths and accomplishing the goals within a specific time will help you refocus and put your mind back on doing things well and reducing the syndrome. I am also attaching another link that focuses on letting go of perfectionism, it has different steps and strategies that will be helpful as letting go of perfectionism will create more management and reduce the syndrome. How to Overcome Perfectionism (anxietycanada.com)

What also might be helpful is to write down what success looks like to you because writing down our goals is a strategy towards goal achievement and it also establishes our measurement of the goal. It creates this boundary to maintain our focus so it does not stray towards something bigger or better. Writing down our goal helps to measure our success based on the goal, not something more perfect.

This is something that you can control if you allow it. Practicing these strategies are important because they are gonna lead you to success and help you to let go of the syndrome. If we don't practice these strategies consistently, that will prevent us from moving forward and working through the syndrome. Also if you start using them and you're using them consistently, and you stop using them, that is what can lead us towards that relapse. It's definitely not an easy process, and it takes a lot of practice, willingness, and commitment. But it's definitely something that's possible and it's important to hold hope to it. Remember practice is what makes permanent.