What abuse means?

Content/Trigger Warning: Please be advised that the article below might mention trauma-related topics that include sexual assault & violence, which could be triggering.

The true meaning of abuse is a mystery.  Many of us question whether we are experiencing abuse sometimes. According to American Psychological Association, abuse is when a person behaves cruelly, violently, demeaningly, or in an invasive manner towards another person. In layman's terms, abuse is any act that deliberately causes harm or injury to others.

Based on this definition, we have been the victim of abuse and the perpetrator of abuse at some point in our lives. Believe it or not, it is human nature to hurt others. The old cliché, Hurt People, Hurt People, still holds in the 21st century. Abuse becomes dangerous when used as a form of control; when a person uses abuse to take power, influence, or direct another's behavior. 

MOST COMMON TYPES OF ABUSE

Physical Abuse

Physical abuse is the intentional use of force to cause harm, pain, injury, or impairment. Examples of physical abuse are punching, slapping, hitting, burning, cutting, bruising, physically restraining, and more. Physical abuse usually does not happen regularly but in cycles. The cycle starts with threats of violence, such as “If you ever do that again, you will regret it.” The goal is to instill fear in the person and give the abuser the power they crave. Next, the physical abuse starts. Lastly, the abuser apologizes or tries to make up for the abuse. This is a form of control as well. The abuser has to make sure the person does not leave them. Then the cycle of abuse begins all over again. Fear is the primary motivator for not only the abuser but the victim as well. The fear of more or worse physical abuse, if anyone ever found out, is why this abuse often goes unreported. 

Psychological/Emotional Abuse

Psychological/Emotional abuse is prevalent, but most people have no idea how to spot it or stop it. Psychological/emotional abuse aims to impair and even destroy the person's inner thoughts, feelings, and self-esteem. When the abuser can cause a person to feel uncertain about their situation, safety, and purpose in life, the abuser has all the power and control. Examples of psychological/emotional abuse are yelling at the person, name-calling, mocking or insulting the person, isolating the person, even ignoring the person, and so much more. Unfortunately, since there are no visible bruises and scars, many people don't believe the person is a victim of abuse. 

Sexual Abuse

Sexual abuse is unwelcomed sexual contact against a person's will, specifically without consent. There is so much more to sexual abuse than the force or coercion of sexual activity. It also includes restricted access to birth control and losing the right to prevent sexually transmitted infections (STIs).

Anyone experiencing any abuse should remember that the abuser is always the person at fault.  If you have been experiencing domestic violence, reach out for help immediately. You can reach the National Domestic Violence Hotline at 1-800-799-7233, 24 hours a day, 7 days a week.