I’m always snapping at everyone for no reason. I feel stressed all the time and overwhelmed. Why?

I live with my family and some extended family. I’m constantly snapping at my husband no matter what he says or does. I feel like I’m always on edge.
Asked by Riri
Answered
12/08/2022

Hi Riri.  That's for reaching out for help.  We all experience anger.  It's a healthy emotion. It's how we express anger that defines whether it's problematic.  When we become impulsive and aggressive, anger affects our relationships and how we feel about ourselves. 

Suppressing anger and not expressing our emotions can lead to irritability, anxiety, depression, and anger towards others. 

There are healthy ways to express anger and manage emotions.  This can be accomplished by paying attention to the situations and circumstances in which we get angry, learning to convey our feelings and communicate our emotions.  Once we identify these triggers we can adjust accordingly.  For example, take a step away, set healthy boundaries, and do some deep breathing. 

There is a difference between responding and reacting.  Taking a few breaths and pausing before responding can help us from being reactive.  Grounding exercises, mindfulness, and calming strategies help relax us and can be the tools we need to respond thoughtfully.

Being self aware and insightful helps us manage our emotions effectively. Reflecting on the situations and issues that cause anger can help us be better in tune to our feelings and emotions. How is anger affecting your life and those around you?  

We can utilize "I" Statements to express our emotions and validate our feelings.  Rather than judging others and blaming them for our behavior, we can respond by saying "I'm feeling overwhelmed, I need a few minutes to process this.  Can we take a break and continue this conversation a little later "

Journaling is a helpful tool to relieve stress and self reflect. It's a great tool for a space free of judgement to get your thoughts out. 

Therapy can help us identify those triggers and situations that lead to stress, anxiety, and anger.  Through cognitive behavior therapy (CBT), a therapist can help teach us coping skills and anger management techniques.  

Reaching out for help is a great first step.  This means we are ready to take action to learn to manage our emotions and develop healthy coping skills.  Wishing you all the best on your journey to improved mental health and wellness. 

(LPC, NCC)