Dealing with loss

Hi, first of all it's nice to meet you and thanks for your question on dealing with grief and loss. Secondly, I'm very sorry to hear about your dad a couple years ago. I know you probably already know this, but the thing about grief is it grows and changes, and even after a period of time can still hit you at full force.

Do you feel like that's possibly still what is happening with the choking and the difficulty breathing that you mentioned? There are techniques to deal with grief, and I would be happy to go over them briefly with you here. We could always go more in depth if you were interested in starting therapy. 

First of all, I think it's important to understand the different stages of grief. There are five basic stages, and they do not need to go in any sort of linear fashion. The final stage, acceptance, is sometimes touch and go, and not a final destination.

One technique of dealing with loss and grief is something that you already mentioned, relying on your faith and on others to talk or be with you through the difficulties that you have been having. So often we feel alone in our grief, it's important to rely on others as best we can when we know we are having a hard time. In particular, major events may be difficult, such as a birthday, death anniversary, or even a happy event, like a graduation or a wedding. It's OK to think about how you miss the person and wish they were still there at times. 

Something else that helps with grief is journaling, either directly to the person that has passed away, or just jotting down your thoughts in general. Some people find closure by a writing directly to the person that they are missing, and some even compose letters writing back. Unfortunately, there is no magic pill to deal with grief and loss, but if you combine some of these strategies it becomes more tolerable.

I appreciate your time and thank you for your question. Good luck and take care!