How can I help myself?
Thank you for reaching out, I'm sorry you are struggling to come to terms with the personal losses around you. it sounds difficult for you right now.
At times these can sometimes feel difficult to process, however unpacking them in a safe space may help you come to a better understanding of these. Bereavement, grief and loss can cause many different symptoms and they can effect people in different ways. Some common symptoms are shock and numbness, overwhelming sadness, crying, tiredness, exhaustion anger and guilt. These feelings may not be present all the time but may appear unexpectedly and we don't always recognize them ourselves. They may also not be linear and can often affect people in different ways - and that's ok.
I hear you when you say you have lost motivation to do things, it's definitely something we can discuss further if you wish. It's important that you acknowledge these feelings and don't try to figure out everything out at once, maybe set yourself some small manageable goals without putting pressure on yourself? Trying not to focus on the things you can't change may be helpful, it can be good to break things down into manageable pieces rather than feel overwhelmed by your whole situation. Maintaining a routine can often help and give a sense of purpose. It sounds like it's time for you to focus on yourself to help you feel better with some extra self care. Perhaps you could look at what you enjoyed before feeling this way and pick up some things that made you happy? Being present in the moment can often help, breathing exercises, meditation, journalling or exercise can often make us feel better. Also reaching out to friends and family may also be beneficial for support so that you do not have to feel alone around your losses.
Rest assured, you are not alone in your thoughts. It's important that you give yourself time to grieve and remember that there is no right or wrong way to feel, it's a very personal and unique process.
Sending kind wishes