Loneliness vs. Isolation?

What a common topic both these terms are in counseling over the last year. Taking the first term “loneliness” is actually a pretty accurate description for many people with depression and social anxiety. Regardless of their ability to learn how to enjoy and be ‘alone,’ for many, the feelings of loneliness emanate from many life situations. These include technology which can feel lonely especially playing the comparison game of others doing more than the viewer, divorced parents, new schools, difficult peer relationships, breakups, loss, working from home, and now as a daily reminder-the pandemic. Even with improved social skills and new friends, it can be natural to at times feel lonely. It is the extreme amounts that turn them isolative and concerning.

When loneliness is actually isolation.

People who experience depression and many other life situations can begin to isolate themselves. This often feels like a way to combat the stress of life, work, social relationships, and other activities and responsibilities. It is often following an event or a depressive episode but can also come from external forces. Loneliness ebbs and flows while isolation is powerful and has a force of separating the person isolated from parts of reality, self-care, logic, and even their emotion. Many describe it as an “emotional and physical wasteland.” Time seems to go by yet standstill at the same time.

How to break free from isolation.

Isolating has detrimental effects from the otherwise temporary feelings of relief it gives from pressure or engagement with others or the self. It grossly affects a person’s ability to manage the regular stress of life. If you find yourself or find a loved one truly isolating (which is different from spending a day decompressing in their bedroom), reach out and connect and empathize. Encourage yourself and others to develop small self-care habits. Some include showering, making your bed, dressing for the day, running an errand, going for a short walk, connecting with someone in writing or the phone, and giving credence to the very difficult situation so many are in. Acknowledging the feelings of loneliness and increased alone time can also act as validation, helping to keep a healthy routine and structure to combat isolation. There is a great advantage in developing new hobbies and pastimes to keep you engaged with yourself and your environment. Our environment is an important part of our connection to the world. Counseling has become a touchpoint for so many, and do not hesitate to utilize this resource to keep yourself accountable and connected.